Biggest lie in America: Sorry, that was my last stick of gum.

roses are red violets are blue i've got alzheimer's ...

What's the difference between a dead baby and my dinner??? Nothing...

So, there's three blondes. Two of them walk into a bar. The third one missed it.

What's worse than the Holocaust? This joke.

What did the man say to the ugly woman? Your face makes my penis soft.

Once upon a time there was a man sleeping, Then he woke up.

What happened when the young child fell off of the swing? He broke open his head causing him to be sent to the hospital for 3 weeks.

What is big has a red nose and is funny Don't ask me I have never been out of my house

Roses are Red grass is greener every time i think of you i touch my weiner

Theres this black guy who goes to a gun shop and buys a .45 and then goes to get a permit and uses it responsibly....

How many dyslexics does it take to screw in a light bulb? Dyslexia is a cognitive learning disability characterized by the sufferer's inability to fluently spell, speak and read. Being a intellectual disability, the chances that dyslexia could impair the practical functionality of a sufferer are very slim and hence it it is highly probable that it would only take one dyslexic to change a light bulb in the simplest of conditions. However, to definitively answer this question, I would have to know a range of variables such as the height above the ground at which the light socket is mounted, the physical height of the dyslexic, the voltage and amp characteristics of the light-bulb itself, the physical well-being of the dyslexic etc. These variables are unknown, are not mentioned in the initial question (as is common for this type of question) and hence, I cannot answer this question to any degree of accuracy.

What did the viking say to the alien? "Vad i namn av valhalla är en utlänning gör här?"

How many mathematicians does it take to count?

Why'd the chicken cross the road? Who cares its a chicken, it probably got hit by a car. Go to McDonalds and get a chicken sandwich there he is

Why did the chicken cross the road? because it looked both ways and saw no cars coming.

How do you kill a hobo? Throw a penny off a clif.. How do you kill another hobo? Tell him the penny's still down there

whats worse than taking a refrigerator to the face? the holocaust and AIDs

what did the man say to the other man he bumped into? sorry. and they never saw eachother again

womens rights

What did the Black guy say to the Jew? Lets be equals

Q: Where does the queen of england live? A: This was the question I had to anwser to be able to post this joke.

why did the teacher say that the student did well in class? because the student did well in class

Steve asks Dave if he likes fish sticks. Dave says yes. Steve asks Dave if he likes to put fish sticks in his mouth. Dave says yes again. They both agree to buy some, prepare them, and eat them, as fish stick are tasty, convenient, and mildly nutritious.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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