Two peanuts were walking down the street..........pepper.

Why did Suzie fall of the swing? Because Suzie was a cucumber.

What's worse than an asian driver? A blindfolded asian driver.

Your mamas so old that she sat next to Jesus in kindergarten?

What do an owl and a squirrel have in common? They can both fly! Except for the squirrel.

Tyrone is innocent! I can't wait until Kirsty gets hers!

How do you leave a jackass in suspense? I'll tell you later.

A man told another,"You suck." The insulted man finished the sentence,"On juice boxes."

I was walking down the road yesterday with only 1 shoe. A man stops by and says "Did you know that you lost a shoe?" I reply "No I didn't. I found 1."

whats got two legs and cant walk a paraplegic

How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? Matters the size of the bathtub and the size of the babies.

Why is the Holocaust/Worm in your apple joke the highest rated joke on Anti Jokes? Most of the viewers of this website clicked on a thumbs up symbol directly below the joke, which by the coding of this website triggered an algorithm that caused the number adjacent to this thumbs up button to increase and also caused the joke to appear higher on the list of most popular jokes.

What is worse than torture? Not much.

How do you make a baby crawl in circles? Nail its hand to the ground

WANNA HERE A JOKE? (no, i purposely clicked in this joke website to simply here to fulfill my demonic internet pleasures.)

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are not very intelligent and was scared by a shadow. The chicken's survival instincts caused it to cross the road, away from the shadow. The chicken crossed the road safely, and is now happily pecking at worms.

John walked up to his dad one morning and shouted, "Dad, it's my birthday!" Dad said, "Cool, how old are you?" John says, "I'm seven!" Dad tells him to go downstairs and tell his grandpa. Johnny runs down and says, "Grandpa, it's my birthday, guess how old I am!" Grandpa sticks his? hand in John's pants and sticks his thumb into his anus. As he pulls his hand out, he pinches his penis. Grandpa says, "You're seven." John says, "How did you know?" Grandpa says, "I heard you tell your dad upstairs."

What do you not want to call a african american that begins with an N and ends with an R? A Neighbor!

What do you call a guy who stabs cereal? A cereal killer.

what doesn't kill you makes you crippled for life because you lost use of your legs in a tragic car accident

You can pick you're friends, you can pick you're nose, but you can't run over a pedestrian.

Why did the shark eat the girl? Because she was ugly

Wanna hear a joke? Niklas Bendter being good at soccer. Wanna hear a funnier joke? Your Mom Wanna hear the funniest joke?

whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? finding two worms in your apple

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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