"Tell me a joke" Tom says Your life.

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you see theres this guy.

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Roses are black Violets are black I'm Helen Keller Everything's black

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Q: What is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a ferrari? A: I don't have a ferari in my garage.

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What did the fish say when he swam into a wall? Nothing, he was a fish.

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Why didn't Pat's grandma go to his birthday party? Because she died last night

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An old jew, an irish man, and a young mexican woman in her mid 20's are on an island. They eventually become hungry to a extremely ravishing extent. The jew cries out: "I can't take the thought of consuming man, because I am only allowed to consume kosher" The Mexican says: "Alright" The Irishman says: "O.K. Until then lets head over to Timilio's... I hear they are a fine establishment and also serve Kosher meals."

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What do you call a man that eats a sandwich? Hungry.

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Why did the boy let the falling brick hit him in the head? He had no legs, so he could not move

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What's clear, glass-like, and makes your brain feel like it's exploding just by smelling it? Crystal Meth

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How do you make money? Kill babies and sell them.

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what's the difference between a baby and a watermelon? one is fun to hit with a sledge hammer, and one is a watermelon

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If you add two 1's together its 11 if you add two 2's together its 22 If you add two 3's together its 33 So what happens if you add 4 and 4? No you dumb-ass its not 44, its 8

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Your mom is so fat, I do not see how she can possibly wipe effectively.

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Whats the difference between a rabbit an a eagle? They both fly except for the rabbit

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You know what I am gonna come up with that could potentially make me millions of dollars? An idea that could potentially make me millions of dollars.

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A man sets his house on fire. His wife comes home, what did she ask? Why'd you set the house on fire?

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Roses are red Violets are blue Thats what they tell me because I'm blind

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hi

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If you call a quiz a quizzicle, what do you call a test? A set of questions or problems used as a means of evaluating the abilities, aptitudes, skills, or performance of an individual or group.

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How many dead babies can fit in a barrel? 4 1/2

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Why did the black guy stop drinking his kool-aid? He learned of its high sugar content and began to drink a glass of water as a healthier option.

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What did the man say when he realized that he was late for work? "Shit, I'm late for work."

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Why did the man wipe his bum with a sweat-shirt? Because they were all out of toilet paper

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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