- Anti Joke

Three examples of how santa is gay 1) he says HO HO HO 2) he sneaks into your house at night from going down the chimney 3) he knows when u r sleeping and he knows when u r awake BONUS............. Better not pout, you better not cry, better watch out im telling u why.........SANTA CLAUS IS COMING TO TOWN

Haikus are easy But sometimes they don't make sense Refrigerator

Why was 6 afraid of 7? 7 commited statutory rape on a younger 5, gang banged 8 with 10 and 11, murdered 9, and was sentenced to jail for life.... eventually the case was dropped and 7 was let out early for community service. He told 6 he was coming for him 6 months later.... 6 was so terrified he didn't know what to do... he was living in fear... eventually he commited suicide by jumping off a cliff just off the coach of Palm Beach into the pacific ocean. His body was never found His family didnt get to say good bye... This is why 6 was afraid of 7

One day, an Irishman, a Jew and an American were walking home from a long game of golf. "God, that was a long game" said the American, to which the Irishman replied "aye, that it was." The Irishman then turned to the Jew, and asked him how he managed to get two birdies in succession. The Jew, after a moment of deliberation, began to explain. "Well, it all began when I was six. See, there was a mountain right next to Casparia, the village I lived for most of my life back in Wales. Every day, I'd come back from school, and ask my dad why nobody ever attempted to scale the mountain. 'To do so would be an unnecessary risk, son, and people are too busy working to put food and water on the tables for their families to undertake something so foolish.' One night, when insomnia was getting the better of me, I decided to get a better look at the mountain, so I strapped on my boots, my fur coat and some woolly mittens and left for the mountain. After a few hours of walking, I approached the closest hill which gave me a perfect view of the mountain's first peak, and there I spotted a polar bear, mauling a hiker to death." The Jew paused to check the Irishman and the American were following, when the American spoke up; "hold on there, there aren't any polar bears in Casparia!" The Irishman also spoke up; "there isn't even a village called Casparia, well, anywhere!" The Jew smiled slightly, and a few seconds later the smile broke out into a gigantic grin, and he finally replied: "exactly".

Roses are red, But ravens are black, Please go to China, and never come back!

Q) What do you get when you cross a brown chicken with a brown cow? A) An abomination

What do you call a man with a gun in his mouth? Keith.

Guy 1: Why does it smell like a wet dog? Guy 2: Because I smell like a wet dog

“It doesn’t take a lot to turn me on” – William Deane

Roses are red, Violates are blue. I have an erection, and its lasted more then three hours

Q: How many burgers did little Johnny eat? A: Involuntary erections.

Q: What do you get when you cross Rebecca Black and a day of the week. A: a stupid song called FRIDAY!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Here's a riddle: What can you catch, but not throw? A really heavy ball, or STDs.

Why couldn't the Egyptian pharaoh solve the Rubik's Cube? He didn't know how.

Why did the blind boy cross the road? Why? The world may never know. He was hit by a bus

What do you call a guy with no arms, no legs, and floats? Nothing, its rude to make fun of disabilities.

It is the conjoining of the two possible outcomes of the interstellar and post modern possibilities of the pasta sex god's niece's favorite colour after she falls off her bike whilst riding down a yellow slide after her twenty-seventh birthday when the two suns form a triangle in the night sky over the delta. Yes indeed that was good pudding.

what is the difference between a banana and an orange? bread.

Why does Derrek Ashmore act so feminine on his facebook statuses? Because he has a vagina so it is appropriate for him

Whats the difference between a pile of dead babies and a pile of shit. I don't have a pile of shit in my garage.

Q. Why did Obama cross the road? A. To collect taxes from the houses on the other side

What's the difference between a Jew and a Boy Scout? Boy Scouts come back from camp.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She had finished her breakfast and had to get to her job as a firefighter.

Why did the fireman wear red suspenders? He'd lost so much weight, due to AIDS.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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