A man goes to the hospital he says to the doctor while poking his leg it hurts here. Then he pokes his arm and here. Then his head and here. "Yes" the doctor says you've broken your finger.

Rebecca Black. That's it. That's the joke.

If the human population held hands around around the equator A significant portion of them would drown.

Why couldn't Sammy ride a Bicycle? -Because Sammy is a Fish

That was totally mean! I mean I was in no way going to say any of that to you! Especially not the last part, sorry that must have been part of the suggestion or something, I barely ever tell myself stuff like that, I mean stop it okay? I mean I totally read it and all but I was all like "I am notnot typing that" please stop it, its humiliating.

So, this cheerio is in love with a beautiful frosted cheerio. He asks her on a date. She says no, because she only dates other frosted cheerios. So the cheerio works really hard at his job and is promoted to a honey-nut cheerio. So he asks her out again. She says no because she only dates frosted cheerios. So he works even harder and is made a frosted cheerio. He asks her out again and she accepts. 4 months later after a relationship built on trust and understanding they are married and live a long and fullfilling life together.

"Knock knock." "Who's there?" "Well judging by the fact that there's no actual door in between us I'm pretty sure you can decide who it is.." "'Well judging by the fact that there's no actual door in between us I'm pretty sure you can decide who it is' who?"

What does a gay horse eat? Carrots

What's worse than being fired? Eating a bucket of diarrhea.

Why did the sloth cross the road To fuck your gay cousin

How did the lazy fat boy burn a lot of calories? He set his fat friend of fire.

Kid A:We're home alone, you know what that means. Kid B:Cover ourselves in vaseline and slide around like slugs on the kitchen floor? Kid A:Yes

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There is a blonde, a redhead, and a brunnette stuck on a deserted island. the redhead gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk the 100 miles back to shore. she begins swimming, gets 10 miles out, gets tired, and drowns. the brunnette gets sick of being trapped, so she decides to risk it too. she gets 50 miles, gets tired, and drowns. The blonde decides to escape as well. she is able to swim 98 miles, gets tired, and swims back.

what did the pregnant women get? A miscarriage

What did the farmer say when the potatoes were ready for harvest? The potatoes are ready for harvest.

What did the cracker say to the cheese? You're so cheesy.

What's brown and rhymes with snoop? Dr. Dre.

Why did the guy in the ferrari stop? -He hit the median at 100mph.

Jack was nimble, Jack was quick, Jack sat on his candle, and burnt his ass.

Whats worse than having cancer? Nothing....

Why do black people like Black Friday? They can get fairly expensive appliances for a very reasonable price.

knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Me Doa Kong Oh, Hi! Come on in.

Have you seen Hellen Keller's children? No. They look just like her.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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