Q: Why was the little girl upset? A: Because she drank a window cleanser, causing her vital organs to shut down, ending in a slow, painful, death.

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What makes the turtle move? It's legs.

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Why did the Mexican cross the border? He wanted to live a better life in pursuit of freedom and a better job.

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"Knock knock" "Who's there?" "GESTAPO! AUFMACHEN!!!"

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1:Your reading my text. 2:Your wondering what the point is. 3:Your getting angry. 5:Your going to click thumbs down. 6:But wait! You didn't realize that there was no number 4. 7:Your checking it. 9:Your smiling. 10:Your smiling so much you forgot to check for number 8. 11:Your checking it. 12:Jokes on you.

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What starts with F and ends in UCK? Firetruck. What starts with P and ends in ORN? Popcorn. What starts with S and ends in HIT? Shit.

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Two men walk into a bedroom. Did I mention they were gay?

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womens rights

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three people walked into a bar and there was a blackman,a jew,a white man and a nazi bartendor which ones did he shoot? The black and the jew and the white man

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what do you call ten white people on a bench ten white people sitting on a bench, possibly eating their lunch

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you're so stupid, you have trouble understanding what you read, like the newspaper, for example

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? He was mauled by a bear!

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What's worse then 2 dead monkeys? 3 dead monkeys!

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What is brown and sticky? A stick

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One day, 2 people were gonna fight after school and then the final bell rung. Everyone gathered in the bathroom to watch the fight. The challenger asks the opponent, "Hey whats that one thing you say when you let the other person win?" then the opponent says, "I give up?" The opponent yells, "I win!"

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Can Anti-Jokes censor curse-word tenses? Fuck Fucking Fucked Fucks

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Why did the black man drown? Because he didn't wait 30 minutes after eating.

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Your mom is so fat she weighs significantly higher then most females of her age and height.

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What happened to the lady living in the present, crossing a street? Let's watch her and find out.

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whats better than 7 babies in one trash can 1 baby in 7 trash cans

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2 doctors are talking to each other? -Dead? -Dead.

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Alpine Ibexes climb nearly 90 degree angles to lick salt deposits off mountain sides. They crave that mineral.

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Why did the boy live on the street? He was an orphan.

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What do you call a person without a heart? Not alive.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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