What did the Jewish man say to the banana? Nothing, because he has common sense

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-I thought the lesson had started? -It has

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What did Billy get his dad for Father's day? Nothing, his dad was killed by a spinning helicopter blade when Billy was 3.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground? Because he was looking for other chickens because he has no friends and he got bullied when he was in 12th grade. He got picked on because he was sledding down his hill in his backyard and he accidentally scraped one side of his face on ice and started bleeding. The next day his classmates started calling him two face.

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A cat walks into a bar. The bartender says "What would you like to drink?" The cat says "Meow."

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Why did the man eat the turnip greens? Because he was morbidly obese, and needed to maintain a proper diet.

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Why do They call a horse a horse? Because They speak English.

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What did the drunk homeless man get for his birthday? Liver cancer.

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Why couldn't Sophie brush her hair? She had leukemia

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Q: What's green and goes round and round and round? A: A baby on a blender

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Yo mama's so fat she threw a rock at the ground and missed.

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Wanna hear a joke? (Yeah, sure) So do I, got any?

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What do you do with a leg less dog? Take him for a drag.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Orange you glad I didn't say banana?

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How many women does it take to screw in a lightbulb? None...they can cook in the dark.

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whats yellow after cani...nathan

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In particle-joke physics, the antijoke is the extension of the concept of the antiparticle to the joke, where the antijoke is composed of antiparticles in the same way that the normal joke is composed of particles. Furthermore, mixing jokes and antijokes can lead to the annihilation of both, in the same way that mixing antiparticles and particles does.The result of antijoke meeting jokes is an explosion.[1]

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Why is McDonalds bad for you? Because their is so much fat in all its products, and contains many calories.

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what did John do to make the cold weather a little less irritating? well, being a homeless man, John did..... nothing.

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What happened when a black lady sat in the front on a bus? She didn't vomit because she could see the road, which helped with her motion sickness. Also the driver got in a better mood because he had company, and the lady was a pleasant person.

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I have to tell yo people a story and you have to answer it. Q/S(Story):There once was a boy by the name of aids. He had aids because he had aids. He dad had aids, his mom had aids his whole family had aids. How did he die? A: He got hit by a bus you heartlest basterd.

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What do you do if your batteries die and you have none left? Go to your nearest battery selling retail store and buy some more.

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Obama

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Why was the girl talking to the trashcan? Her entire family was killed in a forest fire. She was the only who made it out but she had several scars and burns. For six years she had no family to talk to. She then gathered an obnoxious amount of cheaply made plastic trashcans and painted her entire family on the trashcan and proceeded to talk to it. For several years now she has been in deep conversation with the trashcan. She then attempted to ask the trashcan a series and intense question in which the trashcan did not respond to. The girl grew very frustrated with the trashcan because it did not answer her question so she angrily threw it off the side of a cliff in the middle of the woods. To answer the question above, as the trashcan was violently falling off the cliff, the girl yelled, "See you next FALL"

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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