A black car pulls up early in the morning and slows down by your house You see him pull a mysterious object out of his car and point it at you, The paper boy tosses a newspaper at you

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What was the asian person's name? I don't know, I never met him.

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Yo mama's so fat she threw a rock at the ground and missed.

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What do you call an argument between a Jew and a German? World War 2

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Why do black people like fried chicken? Because it's delicous.

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a camel walks into a bar. it is kicked out because camels are not supposed to be in bars, there camels.

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Why couldnt hellen keller drive because she was a women

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Why do They call a horse a horse? Because They speak English.

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Your mum is so ugly that i make jokes about how ugly she is

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A man begged for forgiveness, for a sin commited Jesus forgave him, Jesus loves you

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Knock Knock Who is there? The IRS coming to take your house

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Q. What does the kool aid man say when he breaks into a wall A. Ow

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What didn't the man piss on the dead baby? Because that is just morally wrong. Instead, he reported it to the police and aided the cause of justice.

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What's brown and rhymes with Snoop? Jay-Z

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Why couldn't the boy talk? He drowned.

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What did Newton say to Einstein? Nothing, Newton was dead before Einstein's birth.

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Jerry Sandusky walks up to the reception desk at a day care center. What does the lady at the desk say? Nothing, she promptly gives Mr. Sandusky his son and they leave.

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A doctor walks out of the delivery room, he then relieves a nervous father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happiness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with more information. Your wife died during the delivery.

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what is chuck norris's favorite food? lasagna.

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what happens when a dog and a cat have sex? They create a beautiful baby that ends up dieing from cancer.

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Your mamas so fat, that any level of physical exercise is strenuous, but also mentally challenging, as she feels that there is a negative astigmatism attached to sweaty, red-faced overweight individuals trying to burn those pounds. This in turn makes her ashamed of the gastronomically decadent life she once lived, and so she doesn't have the confidence to try and reverse the damage she did during those insecure teenage years, instead comforting herself with the sugary, fatty bane of her life. She therefore lives in a vicious circle, angry at herself and the society that won't accept her. But remaining incredibly, repulsively fat.

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3 women are on a plane. One blonde, one brunnete, and the other a red head. The pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. The 3 women find out that there is only one parachute in the plane. The plane crashes and they all die.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? To get ran over.

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Gotta disappoint you there, you see there are hundreds, perhaps thousands of similar organizations which work for the government, and those I work for are black ops, meaning that I would be putting my life in danger if I told you anything about it besides that fact. Its not listed anywhere, its not FBI, its not legislated by any government yet many governments invest their funds there, you could call it something like the interpool, and something like the underground society, except its multi-government driven... A term I sincerely do not fully understand myself, I have certain talents I put to use, but I lack the education in order to be more than a employee for these people.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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