What's black, white, and red all over? Something that's black, white, and red all over.

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I've been reading these for the past hour and you guys are just out right terrible! -Sarah

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Q: What's black and white and rape kids? A: Pandas, I lied about the rape.

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Welcome to Horsehead! 1. Our servers are derpy right now, do yourself a favor and never come back, oh yes they are gonna be derpy right then too! 2. THIS IS MY WORLD PEOPLE MYYYYY WOOOOOOOORLD!... ...Ps: My world sucks. 3. Antijokes 30000 per day, other stuff, Zero. (30000 by me) 4. You: People better like me because I dont like myself. Me: I like myself FUCK PEOPLE! FUCK YOU! (thats me on horsehead) welcome to die! 5. IRIS... IRIS! WHAT AM I TYPING FOOOOOOOOOOOOR!

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What would you call the Flinstones if they were black? Niggas

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What happens when you give a boy a cookie? He falls asleep and his parents think he was kidnapped by a serial killer.

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Your mom is so old that her organs are starting to slowly fail and she must be put on life support or she'll die.

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You know what happens when you assume? You make a judgment based on incomplete information.

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A good way to remember which one is Beavis and which one is Butthead is to remember the acronym "Baby Blues." B in baby stands for Beavis, and b in blues stands for Butthead. You're welcome.

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How do you silence Justin Bieber? Hold his head under water until he stops struggling.

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Why did the man laugh as he sat in the electric chair? He was being tickled by the guard.

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What's Funny and has two Wheels A kids falling off his bike

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chuck norris will never have a heart attack because he has great cardiovascular health.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick.

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There's a blind man walking on the south coast of England. He walks off a cliff.

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What is 1 + 1 equal to? 2, because if you have one orange and if you add another orange, you will have 2 oranges, therefore 1 plus 1 is 2.

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420

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If a man dies in China, Does anybody care?

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A blonde, a brunette, and a redhead are trapped on a deserted island when they come across a magic lamp. The brunette rubs the lamp and a genie appears! The genie offers them each a wish. They all make their wishes, but none of them come true as the genie was simply a hallucination brought on by severe trauma and dehydration.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it felt like it.

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I was sitting in traffic the other day. I was runover.

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oh, brown loaf is fine, i'm on my bike.

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Why can't Stevie Wonder read? He has retinopathy of prematurity and was born blind.

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How many frogs does it take to change a light bulb None. Frogs lack the cranial capacity to change said lightbulb. If eventually by evolution they become smart enough to change lightbulbs, they may learn to handle machinery and pose a real threat to humans

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops