Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

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whats worse than 10 babies nailed to a tree? one baby nailed to ten trees.

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Julian Ha.

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Jack and Jill went up the hill, to fetch a pail of water. Jack fell down and broke his crown, and Jill came tumbling after. Up Jack got, and home did trot, as fast as he could caper, to old Dame Dob, who proceeded to get Jill convicted of attempted murder, as well as several millions of dollars for pain and suffering.

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why couldnt justin beiber get into the club? because hes not legal

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Why did the girl fall off the swings? -because she had no arms

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What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust. What's worse than Nickelback? Nothing. -Win G.

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Alister Darling plucks his eyebrows.

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What do you call a black person that plays golf? Jack, his name is Jack.

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How do you tell a clown his fly is open? Say sir your fly is open. Then beat him with a pipe until you cant tell what used to be his face.

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If Spongebob lives in Bikini Bottom, Where is Bikini Top?

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Why was young Timmy Crying? Unfortunately he had a very rare but serious heart condition and he would probably die within a week.

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A man walked into a bar. He stayed for a bit and had a good time.

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What is the best Anti-Joke ever? Your Mom. :(

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Why was the black man running? He has to stay fit for the army.

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Why did the owl visit the hospital? His mom was dying of luekemia.

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Knock knock Who’s there? Knock knock Knock knock who? Knock knock

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Matthew Wyckoff

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How many ADD kids dose it take to screw in a light bulb? one; the attention deficit disorder dose not take away the ability too screw in a light bulb.

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Human race: Let's play hide and seek! BOEING MH370: K faggotz :P

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what did the one girl say to the other girl? i like your shoes.

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Yo momma is so ugly that shes been taking self acceptance classes for her very low self esteem which is only one of many side affects shes had from years of bad relationships and being told she was and infact still is horrifically ugly its a truly sad thing and being the child of her you should be ashamed that you have not worked to help raise her self esteem

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Someone loses their golfball in the trees. Their playing partner replies: "what is this? This berenstein bears?"

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An incoming freshman introduces himself to his Ethics professor by saying, "What's up?" To which the professor responds, "You should never end a sentence with a preposition." The freshman, who is both clever and witty, quickly responds to his future Professor, saying: "Professor, I practice linguistic description, such that I observe language objectively in a way that does not adhere strictly to grammatical and syntactic dogma". The professor, surprised by the student's philosophical disposition, engages the student in a highly constructive dialogue about the philosophy of language, from which both the student and teacher learn more about each other and themselves.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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