What did the Jew get for Christmas? Nothing

thumb_up thumb_down +11

se* is like math add the couple minus the clothes add the cream and just hope they dont multiply

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Yo momma is so fat, that after boarding an airplane the flight crew respectfully asked her to deboard, as with her on board the plane would be exceeding the reccomended weight, and thus be unable to fly safely.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What do you say to a man with no legs at a bus stop.. How you getting on.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A can walks into a bar...HAHAHAHA JK LOL thats not possible! What was I thinking? Silly me! -David Bruggen

thumb_up thumb_down +11

This is a joke.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

A black man walks into a bar in an all white neighborhood. He has a couple of drinks, pays for them, and politely calls a taxi for a ride home.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What brown and sticky? A sticky turd

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the toddler fall in the pool? He was irresponsibly left unattended outside and tripped on the edge of the pool. He died within two minutes and his parents were blamed for his death.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What did Wonder Woman say to Superman? I'm wonder woman.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Roses are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia So do I

thumb_up thumb_down +11

roses are red, violets are blue, poems are stupid, refridgerator

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Whats the difference between a dog and a piranha? Their names.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

There was an English man, an Irish man and a Scottish man. The Welsh man couldn't make it. Again.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What is white and can't climb trees? Toothpaste.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why didn't little jimmy take out the trash? He is a rock

thumb_up thumb_down +11

why does the gay guy like anal-sex? because he's gay.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why is Helen Keller a bad driver? Because her inability to see or hear makes her an extremely dangerous road hazard.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why dose my mom have a penis? She is a man

thumb_up thumb_down +11

What's the diffence between a pieace of fried chicken and a Jew? A Jew wouldnt scream in a fryer.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't. He has no legs.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Ditto, the Slut Pokemon. Ditto is a bisexual f@ggot who will f*ck any Pokemon that moves.

thumb_up thumb_down +11

The word you are looking for is charm, not seduction, I am above such things, and while I have no reason whatsoever to believe either one of us can gain anything from going "eye for an eye", I am sure I can offer whatever financial and even specialized assistance you might require in order to get that eye of yours seeing clearer than before... Worry not, I shall outlaw the name Nero and all the derivations and similarities from my Order, unless someone named Nero actually happens to come by of course...

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Why did Steven Hawkins die? he got a virus

thumb_up thumb_down +11

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops