-I have an idea! Let's play twenty questions! -Alright! But i have to warn u I have piss running down my leg

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Montague goes to the alcoholics meeting and says "Hello I'm Montague and I am an alcoholic" Evreyone points at him and chants "LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!, LOSER!" Montague is appaled, he expected to be welcomed with sympathy and respect. Then he realises his mistake. He has walked into meeting with a bottle of whisky and is wearing a Justin Beiber T Shirt

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What did the homeless man get for his 34th birthday? 34 years of regret.

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Q. What's the difference between a duck? A. One of it's legs.

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Why isnt there any mexicans on star trek? Because even in the future they dont work.

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Why don't they have any badminton courts in the jungle? There just isn't the demand.

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whats worse than a 6 dead babies in a dumpster? You were babysitting them.

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What's better than winning the special Olympics? Getting laid at the special Olympics.

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my girlfriend had a weird fetish, she used to dress up like herself and act like a bitch all the time.

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What do you call it when the Doctor goes back in time to meet himself? A pair o' Docs. What do you call it when Shaquille O'Neil goes back in time to meet himself? Shaquille O'Neil can't go back in time.

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A bloke walks into a bar. He doesn't say 'ouch' because it was a public house and not a hard surfaced object as you may have thought initially

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Why did the Chicken cross the roead? It didn't

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Is your refridgerator running? good, because if it wasn't then your food would spoil.

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Q. How much wood can a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood? A. Actually woodchucks can't chuck wood only beavers can

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what looks about a computer which has two wheels? a bike. i lied about the computer...

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Three Blondes were walking when they come upon some tracks. The first blonde says they're deer tracks. The second blonde says they're elk tracks. The last blonde says they're moose tracks. While they are all arguing about what type of tracks they are, they get hit by a train.

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View Terms of Service

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What did the dog say to the other dog? Woof.

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What do Helen Keller and Beethoven have in common? They both died wondering what the hell their last words were.

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How do you make a tree angry Overall trees have no sense of emotion therefore it is impossible to anger a tree.

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Q: How many children did it take to screw in a light bulb? A: The light bulb was already screwed in and exploded after excessive tampering

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What did the muffin, say to the other muffin? Nothing. Because muffin's are inanimate objects, therefore incapable of speech, or any other sentient action. They baked quietly until the man who was baking them came to the conclusion they were fit for consumption, devoured them, and went on with his day.

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Why did the chicken cross the playground. He didn't. chickens are unsanitary to have in schools

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Why did the Indian have a hard time getting a hotel room? He didn't. He owned the hotel.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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