Why did the dog cross the road? Because the pizza man saw how hungry he was and left a pizza for the dog. So when the dog saw the pizza he went to go get the pizza, because he was hungry. In hindsight the moral of the story is: if you ever see a hungry dog on the other side of the road, become a pizza man (if you aren't already) and give him a pizza.

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What do you say to a womam with two black eyes? Nothing, she's already been told twice.

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How do you make an idiot in suspense?

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Yo mama's so skinny, she should probably go in for eating disorders' counseling.

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A blind man walks into a bar. He had a few drinks then went home.

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Yo mama got so bad teeth her dentist said she should get them surgicly removed and get lifelike dentures

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thats the same sound ur mom made in bed last night

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why did Suzy play jump rope with the neighbors kids? She had no legs!

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Why do giraffes have long necks? So they can reach higher, un-eaten leaves.

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What do you call 100 black men at the bottom of the ocean? A scuba group because during these hot summer months they like to cool off and go scuba diving.

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Why couldn't the young african american read? He was born blind

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Going out for a quiet one, having a drink or two, and returning home.

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what happened to the fat lady she went on a diet and is now skinny but she cant resist mcdonalds big macs so she quickly become fat

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Q. Why did the woman cross the road? A. Who cares, what was she doing out of the kitchen

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Why didn't the skeleton go to his party? Because he used to be alive and was burned to death by an overturned truck carrying chemical's so his family canceled the party to organise the funeral.

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Your mother is of a healthy weight and a pleasure to be around.

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What's worse than a baby on a mattress? A baby under a mattress.

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Why are many frogs green? Because yes they are.

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What do you call a police officer who kills a black person? Innocent

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When's the worst time to use skin moisturizer? When you're a burn victim.

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What do you call a black man that can steal, shoot, and jump? A basketball player.

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If I were in a room with you, Hitler, Stalin, and Palin, and I had a gun with 3 bullets in it, I would drop that gun and run as fast as I could from that room. Sorry, I hate you!

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What time is it in China right now? I have no idea, it would depend on when you are reading this. Perhaps you should look at a world clock, watch, or some other sort of time-telling device rather than humorous website. Its purpose is not to tell time. However, there are many other places for this. Good luck surfing the web, friend. I have aided you the best that I can. I only hope that you will find what you are looking for.

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Why couldn't Hellen Keller drive? Because she was blind.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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