Q:What is harder than nailing ten dead babies to a tree? A:Nailing one dead baby to ten trees.

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A dog walks up to a puddle of pee and he starts to smell it

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In the attic lights Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Lights, voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Leaving the things that are real behind Leaving the things that you love from mind All of the things that you learned from fears Nothin' is left for the years Voices scream Nothin' seen Real's the dream Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic Toys, toys, toys In the attic

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Roses are red, violets are violet. I'm not stupid.

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Q: What kind of punch do vampires drink ? A: None... It's really blood, you should know that by now.

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Roses are red, Violets are purple not f**cking blue!

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whats more embarissing rhan being raped by a squirel? Being a 40 year old virgin working at mcdonalds

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What did one alien say to another alien? I miss Mexico.

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Q: How do you confuse a blonde. A: Put her in a circular room and tell her to pee in the corner. Q: How does a blonde confuse you? A: She says she's done.

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why do woman love the twilight books? i have no idea woman can't read

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What type of jobs do black people have? That depends entirely on their qualifications and suitability to the relevant role.

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Q. How many leprechauns does it take to screw in a light bulb? A. Light bulbs don't exist

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What do you call a Mexican that sails a ship? A sailor

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Why didnt the chicken cross the road? Because he got hit by a bus.

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A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

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What did the mother do when she find out her daughter left for the party? Nothing. She realized her daughter was old enough to make mature descions.

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whats wores than eating a vag. a gaint vag eating you.

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A horse walks into a bar. bar tender: "Why the long face" *bu dum tss" horse: "My wife died of terminal cancer."

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What is the leading cause of death? - Dying.

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how do people without arms and legs have sex? no one has sex with people without arms and legs.

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A blonde, a redhead and a brunette were on an island. There were loads of other people too - the UK is a pretty popular place to live.

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Why didnt the homeless man eat the cheese? Because he died right before he ate it. :-(

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Why can't helen keller drive? She never got her permit

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What's the difference between a dead baby and a tire iron? I've never forcibly expelled three tire irons from my vagina.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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