- Anti Joke

Did you hear about the peanut that was assaulted? He filed a police report weeks ago and is upset by the sluggish nature of the justice system.

Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella? For rain.

A blonde and a brunette walk into a job interview. The brunette gets the job because she is more qualified and has more experience.

How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6 million, 1 to screw it in, and 5,999,999 to die in the holocaust.

A lion walks into petsmart and asks the cashier were the dog food is. The Cashier replies your a cat and the cat food is in isle 4 you pussy

Why didn't little Billy's parents get him the new toy he wanted? Little Billy's parents are dead.

What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

When Michael Jackson was in a dark tunnel, it didn't work when he turned his flashlight. How come? A: Because it was out of battery

What's red and bad for youur teeth? A brick.

Knock knock. Who's there? Penguin. Penguin who? The penguin who apparently lives next door and somehow developed the ability to successfully interact with other species through gesture and retoric.

I pregnant woman wakes in the night because she had a mis-carriage.

Roses are yanks hair Violets are yanks hair sobs and yanks hair I have tricolomania

Roses are red, violets are blue, shit is brown and so are you

What did the black man buy at the fruit shop? Some bananas.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Q: John gets attacked with a chainsaw, how many stitches does he get? A: None, Hes dead jim

Why Do cats purr when you pet them? I'm actually asking a question there I don't know why.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall? Wally.

Why did the girl drop her cookie? She had no arms.

why did the chicken cross the road ...WHO FREAKING CARES!!!!

White guy: I figure she's a gold digger, my neighbor. Black guy: Did you say the N word?

Why couldn't Jimmy ride his bike? Jimmy was a goldfish.

Two men fought over a bag of peanuts. The peanuts won.

Knock knock. Who's there? I eat mop. I eat mop who? (I eat ma poo) Haha. ~Ali M.~

Did you hear about the peanut that was assaulted? He filed a police report weeks ago and is upset by the sluggish nature of the justice system.

Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella? For rain.

A blonde and a brunette walk into a job interview. The brunette gets the job because she is more qualified and has more experience.

How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6 million, 1 to screw it in, and 5,999,999 to die in the holocaust.

A lion walks into petsmart and asks the cashier were the dog food is. The Cashier replies your a cat and the cat food is in isle 4 you pussy

Why didn't little Billy's parents get him the new toy he wanted? Little Billy's parents are dead.

What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

When Michael Jackson was in a dark tunnel, it didn't work when he turned his flashlight. How come? A: Because it was out of battery

What's red and bad for youur teeth? A brick.

Knock knock. Who's there? Penguin. Penguin who? The penguin who apparently lives next door and somehow developed the ability to successfully interact with other species through gesture and retoric.

I pregnant woman wakes in the night because she had a mis-carriage.

Roses are yanks hair Violets are yanks hair sobs and yanks hair I have tricolomania

Roses are red, violets are blue, shit is brown and so are you

What did the black man buy at the fruit shop? Some bananas.

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

Q: John gets attacked with a chainsaw, how many stitches does he get? A: None, Hes dead jim

Why Do cats purr when you pet them? I'm actually asking a question there I don't know why.

What do you call a man with no arms and no legs hanging on the wall? Wally.

Why did the girl drop her cookie? She had no arms.

why did the chicken cross the road ...WHO FREAKING CARES!!!!

White guy: I figure she's a gold digger, my neighbor. Black guy: Did you say the N word?

Why couldn't Jimmy ride his bike? Jimmy was a goldfish.

Two men fought over a bag of peanuts. The peanuts won.

Knock knock. Who's there? I eat mop. I eat mop who? (I eat ma poo) Haha. ~Ali M.~

Did you hear about the peanut that was assaulted? He filed a police report weeks ago and is upset by the sluggish nature of the justice system.

Why does Snoop Dog carry an umbrella? For rain.

A blonde and a brunette walk into a job interview. The brunette gets the job because she is more qualified and has more experience.

How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb? 6 million, 1 to screw it in, and 5,999,999 to die in the holocaust.

A lion walks into petsmart and asks the cashier were the dog food is. The Cashier replies your a cat and the cat food is in isle 4 you pussy

Why didn't little Billy's parents get him the new toy he wanted? Little Billy's parents are dead.

What's bad about being a ghost with no arms or legs? You're dead.

Why DIDN'T the chicken cross the road? Because it got hit by a bus

When Michael Jackson was in a dark tunnel, it didn't work when he turned his flashlight. How come? A: Because it was out of battery

What's red and bad for youur teeth? A brick.

Knock knock. Who's there? Penguin. Penguin who? The penguin who apparently lives next door and somehow developed the ability to successfully interact with other species through gesture and retoric.

I pregnant woman wakes in the night because she had a mis-carriage.

Roses are *yanks hair* Violets are *yanks hair* *sobs and yanks hair* I have tricolomania

Roses are red, violets are blue, shit is brown and so are you

What did the black man buy at the fruit shop? Some bananas.

Anti Joke

Our Updated iOS App!

The Anti Joke Book

MOAR??

Roses are yanks hair Violets are yanks hair sobs and yanks hair I have tricolomania