Why did Harry Potter go to meet Professor Lupin? --Because he wanted to practice casting his Patronus

What's as hard as rock and as light as a feather? Any object in the space, once the lack of gravity makes atoms to have not weight, since mass x gravity equals to weight.

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ME

A blonde walks into a bar, and hit it head on, she is now in the hospital grasping for her life but the threatening grips of hell keep pulling her into the wretched plains of fiery wrath and despair... -Avery Vartanian

why did the kid stop eating his breakfast...two Penn state officials knocked at the door

I run, but I have no legs. I see, but I have no eyes. What am I? A prospective result of future medical advancements that allow the disabled to live normal, healthy and fulfilling lives.

Whats red but smells like blue paint? Red paint

Why don't Catholics allow people to wear condoms? Because they get stuck in the alter boys braces.

You're such a retard, you have to take special education, live with a mother that doesn't know what to do with you, not understand the real world, and have people look at you strangely for the rest of your life.

why did the man stay home on a monday? He was dead.

Why was the Mexican running? He was being chased by border patrol!

What more fun than a barrel full of monkeys? A barrel of dead babies

what did the blond say to his mother?? Nothing. He is deaf and has to use sign language.

why did graeme go to olivias house to do fun things

Why did the chicken cross the road? Its children were just slaughtered.

How did Sarah Offet win? He had no arms. Knock, knock? Whose there? Not Sarah Offet

What do you call a man with no arms? A: A Man with no arms.

I think everybody should have a penis.

what's worse than stubbing your toe? a hospital fire.

Hey I just meet you. And this is crazy, but im a Zombie. And you looks tasty!

What's the difference between getting hit by a car and being struck by lightning? Impossible to tell, they are 2 entirely different circumstances with limited certainties.

Your mum's so fat, she should probably consult her local GP to insure she doesn't die of a cardiac arrest.

a young mother cow died in a street crossing by a large oil truck, she was never buried and became infested with maggots in the next few days

Person 1: "Broo my dicks like 19 inches!" Person 2: "Thas not healthy, an erection that big will deprive your brain of too much blood and kill you."

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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