What did the kid with no legs get for Christmas? A Pogo Stick

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13 =B you just learned something

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Penis

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What do you call a boy with no arms and no legs in the water? Bob What do you call that same kid when he's at your doorstep? Matt What do you call that same kid when he's hanging in your room? I don't know, but you should stop calling him names.

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What happened to the boy that got raped? He later died of depression

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What is the best part about having sex with tweny-six year olds. There are twenty of them. ap~pac

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Ask me if I am a Truck Are You a Truck No

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What's black and hanging from the tree in my backyard? My black, tree-hugging friend.

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When life gives you lemons you are like "how did I get these lemons?"

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Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A. From a catalogue.

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why did jenny drop her ice cream? she got hit by a bus. knock knock who's there? not jenny.

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your momma is so stupid shes fricken retarded

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Why did the little boy sit next to the big boy? Because he wanted to get raped by big Jake!

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Obama lin Baden.

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Why is Bruce Wayne named Batman and Tim Drake named Robin? They wanted to hunt bats and robins whenever someone does something bad.

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On a scale of 1 to Kevin James, how much do you exercise?

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whats worst then being raped tortured and killed? it happening to 500000 puppies DX

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A man and his young child walk into a clinic to get physical check-up. The man learns from the physicist he doesn't mater. His wife remarries and start having frequent sex and the child is scarred for life. This is irrelevant because both parents don't exist and this is all a constant delusion in an psychiatric hospital.

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You are so ugly that when you were born the doctor didn't say anything to your mother because he has social manners.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Why? I ASKED YOU FIRST!

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A panda walks into a bar and orders a beer and a hamburger. After he eats he stands up stretches and pulls out a gun shooting everyone in the room but the bartender. The panda puts $20 on the bar and turns to leave. As he walks out the door the bartender asks why the panda shot everyone. The panda tells him to look in the encyclopedia. The bartender looks up panda and he reads: "A rare bearlike mammal (Ailuropoda melanoleuca) of the mountains of China and Tibet, having woolly fur with distinctive black and white markings. Also called giant panda, panda bear." Seeing absolutely nothing in this description that would rationalize the homicides the panda had just committed, the bartender arrived at the reasonable conclusion that the panda was psychotic and having severe psychological problems which probably caused the incident. The bartender couldn't help but wonder if this tragedy could've been avoided had the panda been properly screened for schizophrenia and guns been properly secured in a safe at the panda's mother's house.

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Let's get some comments on this one! Everyone add a comment with a quote from a movie! I'll thumbs-up the best comments!

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What did the man say to the other man. Hi

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How do you stop a dog from digging up your garden? Every time it does so, shout at the dog so it knows it has misbehaved. Keep doing this and the dog will eventually understand the error of its ways.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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