Why doesn't Harry have any arms? Because he's a Jew.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? I don't know, I've never tried to.

Why did the parents order the 16 year old daughter to move out of Virginia? Because she lost her virginity

Q: how do you get a live elephant into a refrigerator? A: you buy an industrial sized refrigerator from cost-co and then walk the elephant slowly but surely through the door. Q: how do you get a giraffe in a refrigerator? A: after removing the elephant by means of walking out the door, slice the giraffe into small pieces approx. 1m by 1m by 1m and put those into the refrigerator

Under Chuck Norris' beard, there is a chin.

69

Why wouldn't someone want to work in the mining industry? Their dad died in the mines.

whats worse than watching your house burn to the ground? Sarah Palin becoming president

Roses are red Violets are blue Today is Valentines Day I am depressed

A elderly man was driving down the freeway when he got a call from his wife. He answered the phone and his wife said "Be careful dear, I just heard on the news that someone is driving the wrong way on the freeway." The wife then heard a loud crash over the phone as the drunk driver going the wrong way slammed head first into her husbands car, killing them both intstantly.

Why was Jimmy so bad at jumping rope? His father's car ran over an IED back in 2009. Jimmy had lost his legs in a tragic explosion.

What are crabs with out the crabs Nothing hahahahaha

What's the difference between a Mexican and a pizza? A pizza can feed a family of four.

Why did the Black man buy some slaves? They were his family

A Black man is running down the street with a T.V. He just bought it with the money he is getting from his recent promotion to partner at a local Law firm. He is running because he had to park far away and wanted to get out of the rain.

Why can't Helen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

Why did the chicken cross the road? He didn't, a car ran him over.

Why did the black man kill himself? Because he had a very serious case of depression brought on by his recent divorce

why did the skeleton cross the road ? because it wanted too. lolz

What's blck and blue and doesn't like sex? The ten year old in my car.

Knock knock. Who's there? I am. I am who? I am pregnant.

Knock Knock Who's there? Hitler... Time to go to Aushcwitz

Hats better than a stick? A stone

Why did Susie drop her ice cream? She was hit by a bus. Knock knock Who's there? Not Susie.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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