A man walks into a bar, he then proceeds to purchase his favorite alcoholic beverage.

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there are seven of us," reply the babies, "now get us a round of bloody marys

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Two muffins are in an oven. After a set period of time, they finish baking and are enjoyed by the family who had made them. Two weeks later the eldest daughter contracts syphilis thanks to numerous sexual partners. She soon dies leaving her parents and brother depressed. Her brother is kidnapped by a viscous child predator and the mother commits suicide. The father gets a job with the New York Yankees. He is eaten by a genetically modified zebra.

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Sometimes I finger myself to some Madonna and Mary J. Blige shit. - Jesse

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Why did the boy trip over the garden gnome? He didn't trip. He died of a burst artery.

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Adam Claypool is a fag. and his mother sweats my cum. Now that we got that out of the way lets get to the jokes.

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We spent trillions of tax payer's money on the death of 1 man... wait that's not funny...

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-Knock! Knock! -Who's there? -Bob. Is Brian's here? -Wrong adress. Brian's home is the first one at your right. -Oh sorry. Have a nice day.

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PENIS that is all

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A black man and a mexican jump off a building at the same time, who lands first? Who cares?

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so a black guy, an asian, and a scott are sitting at a bar, they drink responsibly, pay their tab, and leave. The evening couldn't have been more pleasant.

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A man walks in to a bar and everyone screamed running out the door.

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What's funny about 9/11. Nothing.

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How do you get the pesky neighborhood kids off your front lawn? Molest them.

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what is the difference beyween football and baseball the superbowl and world series

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You know you guys are suppose to post jokes, not basketball comments.

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why did the man fall? cuz he jumped from a building

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David Copperfield (the magician you moron). "I will now perform my greatest act yet!" Everyone applauded as he put the screaming woman (for effects you know) into the first end of the meatgrinder, and surprisingly grinded meat came out the other side! And the woman? She disappeared... forever! *applause* Moral: BRAVO! BRAVO!

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If you add two 1's together its 11 if you add two 2's together its 22 If you add two 3's together its 33 So what happens if you add 4 and 4? No you dumb-ass its not 44, its 8

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Q. What did the mockingbird say to the blue jay? A. I mock you by mocking you

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How does a man with no arms ride a bicycle? He can't, he loses control and falls over, getting a few scrapes and bruises.

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Whats a six letter name for black people? Friend.

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What's the difference between a black man and a gorilla? One is a black man and the other is a gorilla.

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Q: What's not funny and has three wheels? A: The Holocaust, I lied about the wheels and not being funny.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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