- Anti Joke

Q: How do you keep a blond occupied for an hour? A: You write "flip over" on both sides of a blank piece of paper.

What's twelve inches long and makes women scream? Crib death.

q: why won't the asian girl do anything? a: it's pretty hard to move or speak being gagged and tied up in my basement

roses are red violets are blue you smell like poo I F*****G HATE YOU!

what's worse than the Holocaust. Finding two worms in your apple.

Why did the chicken cross the road? The farm was sold and he had no other place to go.

Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 is a registered sex offender.

3 men walk into a bank. They rob the bank and kil 13 hostages.

What happens when you turn 70? You have to go into your settings and make the text in your phone larger just so you can read it. What happens when you turn 71? You still have to go into your settings and make the text in your phone larger just so you can read it.

What is white and weighs twice as much as Shamoo? My ass.

I used to work as a human cannonball. I thought I was going to get fired, however during one performance the trajectory was miscalculated and I ended up severely damaging my spinal cord. I now work from home as a IT consultant. It's depressing.

What do you do when you see a hot girl in your bed

'Peter Piper picked a peck of pickled peppers.' That's fantastic because Peter Piper was paralyzed and the doctors said he would never be able tomove is arms or legs again, and there he is picking a peck of pickled peppers. I applaud you Peter Piper.

Q: What's blue and yellow all over? A: A baby at the bottom of the pool with a slashed floatie. Q: What's red and yellow all over? A: A floatie at the top of a pool with a slashed baby.

a man walks into a bar and buys a drink

Why did the chicken cross the road? He did it for fitness.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

Why did the bird fall. Its tree got cut down.

What did one bunny rabbit say to the other bunny rabbit? I'm a bunny rabbit!

Why did the boy cut his hair? Because he was large.

What is Dora the Explorer's favorite food? Pussy.

This sentence is not humorous in any fashion whatsoever.

whats wrose than slipping on a banana? Getting Shot in the face.