Why did lisa fall of her bike? Because her dad threw a refrigerator at her. -JCB

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Q: Why did Steve fall out of the tree A: He was raking the leaves

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Why couldn't the prostitute give a proper blow job..... She had no lips

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When you have read this, you've already read it.

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I like touching my boobs

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A Muslim walks into a bar. No-one survived the blast.

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Lol XD,now that is bad ass of you to say that, what about her, does she get to go around too?

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why did the guy round second base? to get to 3rd

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A man told his daughter not to give his dog coffee. His daughter turned and told him that she was his nurse and his alzheimers is getting worse.

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What's black and white and red all over? A newspaper. No. A nun with a terrible nosebleed. Nobody ever reads the whole newspaper.

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What do you call an unconscious black man? An ambulance.

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A black man walks up to a white man with a shaved head and boots in a bar He then hands him a ten dollar bill and tells him he dropped it

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Your momma's so fat she ate oranges and coffe

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What do you call a man with no arms? Richard, as that is his name.

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Why couldn't kitty drink it's milk?\ It's face was nailed to the floor

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Why did george washington not make it to the prom? because george washington is dead

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, You just died, and I'm laughing at you and your extremely ugly face.

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Why did the plane crash? Because the pilot was a tomato.

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A Christian and an Atheist are sitting next to each other in a bar. C: Sad you don't believe in God, 'cuz you'll go to hell after your death. A:I don't believe in hell neither..

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Knock knock. Who's there? Your mother. Please open the door. Your mother who? You were adopted.

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What's the difference between a picnic table and a Mexican? A picnic table can support a family of four.

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What do you call a homeless man in Beverly Hills? Charles, Someone who unfortunately had to drop out of school at a young age to work to support his dying mother. Hence, later in life, after his mother died, lacked the education to be enrolled in college forcing him to pimp to make enough money to eat and pay for the rent in his one bedroom appartment in his hometown-Mississippi. But times were tough in Mississippi and not many people could afford a whore. This forces him to go all the way to California where he found more people there were willing to pay for a whore. Business was good and soon enough he had enough money for a decent condo. But Charles still morned the death of his mother. Eventually he couldn't take the daily pressure of being a pimp and thought of his mothers death, so he turned to heroin. Soon all his money was fueling his addiction and before he knew it he was on the street, with no one to help him and no where's to go. Every night he goes to sleep on his cardboard box with the memory of his late mother in the back of his head. Sometimes Charles wonders what he could of been if he didn't drop out of school, but he knows that what he did was the right thing.

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GOODBYE

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A brunette, redhead, and a blond were on a road trip when their car broke down in the middle of a desert. The red-head offered to walk down the road to get help, for none of them knew how to repair the car. She walked down the road in the direction they were headed, but never came back. The redhead and blond died several days later in the shade of the car as a result of extensive heat exhaustion.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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