What does Santa give to a naughty child who wants coal for Christmas? Nothing, Santa doesn't exist.

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What did the little boy say to his cat? Masturbate on my moms corpse.

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What do you call a black man on the moon? Another successful moon landing by NASA in which the African-American astronaut went on a successful moon walk.

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Little Johnny walked into class one day. The teacher announced their would be a pop-quiz on the declaration of independence. Johnny passed. (ic3)

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A mother had three kids: 1st kid- “Mom, why did you name me Daisy?” Mom- “Because when you were a baby a daisy fell on your head.” 2nd kid- “Mommy, why did you name me Rose?” Mom- “Because when you were a baby a rose fell on your head.” 3rd kid- “Blahblahblahflismdjsk” *makes retarded noises* Mom- “SHUT UP BRICK!”

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An anteatter walks into a bar, the bar tender says "hey renee zellweger"

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Why is the deer afraid of the hunter? Because he doesn't want to get shot.

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Why did the woman cross the road? Better yet, why is she out of the kitchen

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How do you confuse a gay person? How? 7

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Why did the black man go to hospital? To cure his black.

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Q:What did the boy do when his girlfriend cheated on him? A:He broke up with her because cheating is wrong and he deserves better.

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Knock Knock. Who's There? A Banana. The middle aged man opened the door, prepared to distribute candy to the trick or treaters.

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How many dead babies can you fit in a bathtub? It's dependent on many factors, like the size of the babies and the tub. It would be a horrific endeavor, and you should probably stop thinking about such things.

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Three people walk into a bar. Eight people follow them. They all go back to Bob's house, except Anna, Jimmy, and Joe. TImes the amount of people going to Bob's house by four. Thats how many people get arrested at the end of the night. How many people aren't arrested? Do you even know why you read this? Get a life and go to an actual bar, a party and get arrested.

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that wall over there ->

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Why is the man's nose bleeding? Because I punched him in the nose. He looked at me funny.

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Roses are Red Lemons are Sour Pull Down Your Pants And Give Me an Hour

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Why was the girl crying when she got home? She got raped and mugged on the walk home

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Black people are like jelly beans. Nobody likes the black one's.

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What did one bunny rabbit say to the other bunny rabbit? I'm a bunny rabbit!

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How do you kill a beetle? Wait outside his apartment and shoot him

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What's black, white, and red all over? An African American and Caucasian man painting a house with red paint and accidentally spilling some on themselves

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Do you know what really hurts my feelings? Nerve damage.

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Roses are red Violets are blue Some poems rhyme But this one doesn't

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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