Whats smells like a banana and is purple? A banana, I lied about the purple thing.

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Yo momma's so skinny she doesn't have any fat!

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Sticks and stones may break my bones because I have osteoporosis

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A horse walks into a bar. bar tender: "Why the long face" *bu dum tss" horse: "My wife died of terminal cancer."

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A fireman walks into a bar. Everyone has burned alive already, and he's too late to save them.

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There is a blond and a burnette in a car. The blonde is driving. What a nice use of the carpool

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A blonde, a redhead and a brunette were on an island. There were loads of other people too - the UK is a pretty popular place to live.

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What kind of ship never sinks? Not the Titanic.

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One night a policewoman pulls over a drunk driver. She politely asks him to step out of his car. He willingly does so. She says, "Anything you say can and will be Held against you." He replies "BREASTS."

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A zebra walks into bar, the surrounding customers in the bar become very intrigued why this exotic creature has wandered from Africa into New york. Before they can come to a concluson animal control opens fire on the creature, splatering its organs onto the tables. This event ruined the night for most customers and they fileout of the bar calmly but sad

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Roeses are red lemons are sour open your legs and give me an hour

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why did the chicken cross the road? to form the basis of an extremly popular jokewhich would grace the schoolyards around the world for centurys to come!

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Why can't Larry drive? Larry's a rock.

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Violets are blue Roses are red I stabbed you 37 times in the chest Now you're dead

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knock knock Who's there? Me Me who? Me Doa Kong Oh, Hi! Come on in.

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Knock knock Whos there? Do you have a moment to talk about our lord and savior jesus christ?

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Q: What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor ? A: The holocaust

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Hey I just banged you, and it was crazy, delete my number, and keep the baby.

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Q: What do you call 10 babies at the bottom of the ocean? A: Dead

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why did the man leave his house during a state of emergency? he didnt

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Person 1: What do you get when you cross a cow and your mom? Person 2: What? Person 1: A cow that looks like your mom

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Incorrect. Violets are violet. DERP!

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Who is that? That is my daughter, She likes climbing trees.

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Why was the Asian terrible at driving? He was drunk.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops