a jewish guy walks in to a bar says to the bartender says "I have aids" and the jewish man replys "my bad"

My dog dumps in my house she looks at me and says rut row

An orthodox rabbi, a Methodist preacher and a Muslim Cleric walk into a bar and blow that month's tithings on video slots.

Looks like this is a *puts on sunglasses* Pair of sunglasses

Why did Dr. Phil fall of the swing? He couldn't figure out the couples problem.

A woman buys a man a Valentine's Day present.

Why was the white man's girlfriend a whore? Because she engaged in sexual relations with a multitude of other men.

Your mamma's so obese that she can't stand up. She's been like this for years. That's because she's dead. She died of cardiovascular-related diseases.

Whats funnier than a dead baby? a dead baby in a clown costume!!!

Roses are brown, Violets are brown, WHO THE HELL $#!T IN MY GARDEN?!

Q: whats the difference between 3 asain people 3 black people and 3 mexican prople?? A: there all different nationality

Why did Mia fall off of Lucy's bike? Because Lucy didn't like Mia and shot her in the face.

Why doesn't my mom make dinner anymore? she died in a fire on my birthday.

Knock Knock! Who's there? ....Mrs Murray silently returned to her armchair, a single tear rolling down her weathered cheek. Her lonely existence deepened, as she realised the gang of boys had fooled her again.

Why did the baby cross the road? Because it was stapled to the chicken.

You tell me. I have amnesia.

Roses are red, Violets are blue. Some poems rhyme, Some don't.

Q : WHAT DID THE SMALL SHEEP SAY TO THE BIG SHEEP ? Z : BÆÆÆ

What did the dog say to the astro turf? SHUT UP!! I don't want to here your excuses, put the dishes away when you're done with them or so help me! You see the dog had been abused as a puppy and as a result he was always a bit off.

Roses are red Violets are blue I'm schizophrenic And so am I

Life's like a box of chocolates it's shit if you have diabetes

nothing drews nose is f**ing hilarious

what did the astronaut say to the rocket scientist? hi

What is black and white, and red all over? A mutilated penguin.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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