Q: What's blue and yellow all over? A: A baby at the bottom of the pool with a slashed floatie. Q: What's red and yellow all over? A: A floatie at the top of a pool with a slashed baby.

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How do you stop a black man from drowning? Through him a survival buoy

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What did the kid with no arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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What's worse than a bee sting? Two bee stings. What's worse than two bee stings? The Holocaust. What's worse than the Holocaust? The extinction of the human species.

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Trouble with the trolley, eh? No

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Did you hear about the guy who got run over? Me neither

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I'm tired of hearing Holocaust jokes, Anne Frankly I'm disappointed.

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The boy said to the priest, may God be with you. The priest responded with, "And also IN you".

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Help i have fallen and i cannont get up Life alert life alert To bad just sit there we dont care

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wat does say to another bird....... chirp chirp

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what was postman pat's name before he was a postman? Pat.

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An American, a Canadian, and a Scottish man died in a horrible car accident. Their story was used as a lesson to keep teenagers from drunk driving.

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Q: What did the Goth-Punk girl write on her test for the question "What are three kinds of rock?" A: Igneous, Sedimentary, & Metamorphic, She is a 4.0 Geology Major attending a respectable University. She simply chooses to express herself through the musical and clothing trends that emerged in 1970's English underground music. In reality it her personal preferences in the aforementioned areas have no bearing on her intellectual or academic standing.

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Q. why did the boy who just had his first kiss feel no emotion? A. He got hit a Croquet mallet and died

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An alligator walks into a bar. The bar tender calls animal control and calmly escorts everyone out the back door.

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Why did the bird fall out of the tree? Because it was struck by lightning and died.

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whats worse than a paper cut? getting your head chopped off

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Whats the same between an elephant and a grape? They're both purple except for the elephant

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Hitler said "Jew mad?" I did nazi that coming !

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What do anti-jokes and a can of corn have in common? Both can be stored indefinitely and accessed and enjoyed at will.

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Roses are red. Violets are blue. Why are VIOLETS blue?

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what do 9 out of 10 people enjoy?............Gangrape

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the awkward moment when you have a boner on your boner

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I was walking down a railway line the other day... I was fined £1000

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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