I drive a 'rarri

A man is taking a shower in jail where he drops the soap. He proceeds to pick the soap up and cleans the rest of his body, puts his orange jumpsuit on and returns to his cell.

You: Did u hear the one about that guy walking into a bar? Them: No. You: He said it hurt

Q: Why did the dead baby cross the road??? A: It was stapled to the chicken.

Why did the horse die? I shot it in the face.

Why was six afraid of seven? Back when seven was in Vietnam, he sufferd Posttraumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) and constantly has flash backs and irrational thoughts of six being with the veitnamese alliance and tries to viciously molest six whenever he runs out of anxiety medication.

Did you just admit being considerate? I do not care about who gets the last comment anymore, I need to tear my face away from the screen ASAP.

Roses are red Violets are blue Daisies are yellow Trust me, I'm a florist.

What did the moose say to the photographer? Moose say cheese.

Why was the boy crying on his birthday? He was being molested by his birthday clown who he was fully aware was his alcoholic costumed father.... And it wasn't his birthday.

What do you call a flat-chested woman with a penis? A man.

A black man, a jew, a hispanic, and an asian are the only survivors of a plane crash, and end up on a deserted island, what do they do? Die.

Q-Whos the best server at Sonic? A-Kevin !

What's red white, blue and hilarious? Glasgow Rangers in administration!

Why did the man look up into the sky? carrot cake

A man is going to sign up for life insurance, he is stabbed by a mugger on the way and spends his last breath in a puddle hating the cruel irony of his fate.

All I can say is that its not the feds, and not Interpol nothing "legal" nor anything belonging to the state as far as we can tell. You all stay locked up, and I will make sure this little geek with shitty breath does not say anything about you, as for the rest, I cant say much.

What is the same about a Duck and a Pickle? Neither of them can ride a bike.

Two icebears are siiting on a iceberg one says to the other: Are you fine with me pushing you off? the other one responds: Would you marry me?

What's grey and doesn't climb trees? A car park.

Roses are red Violets are blue one plus one Equals two

why did the skeleton drop his juice? Because he has no stomach LOLOLOLOLOLOLOLOLO

Whats the difference between a giraffe and an elephant. Ones a giraffe and ones and elephant

Do you know what Stevie Wonder's house looks like? No. Well, neither does he.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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