The President, The Pope, and a small child are all in an airplane when the pilot announces that the plane is going to crash. They crash into the ocean and quickly remember that there is a life vest under their seats, which they promptly put on and safely inflate after exiting the cabin of the aircraft by pulling down on one or both of the red tabs.

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whats the difference between a bench and a mexican? a bench can support its family

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A squirrel walks up to a tree and says, "I forgot to store acorns for the winter and now I am dead." Ha! It is funny because the squirrel gets dead.

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Your mother is so fat, she tried to suicide because she was unhappy with her weight. She tried a diet and it didn't work; she suffers from depression and went to see a doctor about her weight. Life is getting worse for your mother and she is starting to develop diabetes. Your relatives and cousins are going to the hospital to visit her sometime this week; the doctor says she only has about a week left before she passes away.

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What's the song that goes like, duh duh da duh duh duh da da do?

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What do you get if you cross a fairy cake with some boiled parsnips? Fladgemuffin

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Is it better to be born black or gay? No way to know. That is, unless you are black and gay.

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Why is 6 afraid of 7? Because seven threatened to murder his family

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what did the homeless man get for Christmas? RAPED.

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Knock knock. Who's there? Me. Oh.

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A horse walks into a bar and asks the bartender "why the long face?" The bartender replies "this is the fourth time this week a horse walked into my bar and every time it happened i have to clean up a bunch of horse pooh!"

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What do Michael Jackson and a T-Rex have in common? They're both dead.

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What do you call a black man on a bike? A hard-working individual who found a steady job and earned enough money to buy a bicycle of his own which he rides to and from his job because he is healthy, doesn't like to waste money on gas, and doesn't like the pollution automobiles put into the air. By Darragh Hamilton

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A: Knock Knock! B: RING THE DOORBELL YA DUMMY

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What's the hardest part about blending a baby? My dick

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Bill: Hey Scott, do you have the time? John: My name is John, you must have mistaken me for someone else. Bill: Oh. I apologize for the inconvenience. John: No problem. By the way, the time is 3:34. Bill: I don't actually need the time, me and Scott just have this inside joke of me asking the time when we both very well know that he refuses to wear a wristwatch. John: Alright

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Why can't Anne Frank write a sequel? Because she's dead.

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Q: why couldn't anyone hear hellen keller when she fell off a cliff? A: she was mute.

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Hey I just met you and this is crazy, I am pregnant and that's yo baby !

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What do you call a black guy with a white guy name? Bradley

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your moms so fat that she had to buy bigger cloths, her husband left her, she became a druggie and died alone.

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BEST PLACE IN THE WORLD COPENHAGEN !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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What's worse then running out of toilet paper? Getting shot

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What's the difference between a boodle and a scoodle? Ladoodle!

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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