Your mama's so fat, that when she opened the window, wind came in!!!

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Who has two thumbs and is happy? This girl! You're a girl?

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Why don't you ever want to greet your friend Jack on the plane? Because your wife cheated on you with him and she is having his baby, if you were to even think about talking to Jack, you'd end up slitting his throat and throwing him off the side of the plane into a crocodile pit where they will make a feast of his body for the next couple days... So just don't greet Jack

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what's white and 10 inches? nothing....

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Your feet are so big your gonna need bigger shoes.

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A kid walks in to a bar. The bartender asks the boy where his parents are and he replies that he does not know. They call the police who proceed to try to contact the boy's parents. They have gone missing so the boy must go up for adoption. He gets adopted by an abusive family and runs away. Without a family, job, or money, he could not afford a house. He lived alone in a box until he died of starvation.

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Q: There was a train wreck in the middle of nowhere, every one died, no one saw the train wreck, so how did the story about the wreck get out? A:Many philosophers believe that the universe is a figment of its own imagination. Therefore, if "the universe" decided that it wanted the story to get out, it could have just made it so since it is its own imagination.

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A Christian, a Sunni Muslim, and a Shi'a Muslim walked into a government building. Turns out, they were Lebanese, so this was a normal occurrence. Thus, to draw any humor from it before first taking into account the weaknesses of your own government would be both unwise and unfair.

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Q: Why did the little girl fall off the swing? A: Hahahaha! I can't read.

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How does a guy with no arms kill himself? It's called murder.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I am ADD Bird

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what did the dog say when he walked in to a bar? Bark

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A man and woman walk into a funeral home. They are both very sad about the loss of their father who they loved dearly.

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What do you call one white guy surrounded by 10 BIG black guys? The most common NFL Offence

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what is the difference between a pile of dead babies and a cadilac. a cadilac is something i want

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What did the Rasta man say when he got his dread stuckin the toilet ?

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Why did the boy throw butter out the window? To test the principles of gravity.

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A black man was walking down the street wearing a ski mask. It was cold outside.

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Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? It was shot In the face. Why did the cow fall out of the tree it was stapled to the monkey.

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What did they gay chicken say to the straight chicken? .... nothing, chickens dont speek.

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What's faster than a Nascar Racecar? My thoughts. -Juanita

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knock know. who there?.............. whose there?.........whose there!?!?! damn kids

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-What do you do when the dishwasher is broken? -Slap HER!

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So there was a guy in the middle of the street, how did he survive? ...He doesnt because he gets hit by a car becuase hes in the middle of the street...

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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