A dyslexic man into bar walks a.

A pirate walks into a bar with a wheel on his crotch, and the bartender says, "What's that?" and the pirate says, "A deadly tumor."

Who has two thumbs and is happy? This girl! You're a girl?

Thank you Nero, this might not sound apropiate at all, but I am in love with you and have always been, and just want you to know that what I love the most about you is your spirit, your kindness, and sincerely, how you make me feel safe, I think its that you are dead honest to the point where you insult people asking for your opinion, I never had to question what you really mean or want, you just say it out loud, I love you, I realize it must be strange hearing that from someone you see as a daughter, I remember my father too well to consider you one, but I guess I always considered you a hot big brother of sorts. You are 32 huh? You always knew did you not? Why that secret of all things? Ill be arriving as soon as those trained killers of yours show by, and man are they fast and loyal, only you could inspire that love. I know your name is Nero, but I would not mind calling you Axel or at least knight, that's what you have always been for me.

A Christian, a Sunni Muslim, and a Shi'a Muslim walked into a government building. Turns out, they were Lebanese, so this was a normal occurrence. Thus, to draw any humor from it before first taking into account the weaknesses of your own government would be both unwise and unfair.

What's red and has wheels? A red car

A duct walks into a bar. The writer meant to write duck and then proceed to make a clever joke but instead a typo was made and a very unlikely occurence was writtern about considering air passages are not capable of walking and would most likely already be in the ceiling of the bar as too bring fresh air into the bar is important.

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Why did Sarah fall off the swing? She had no arms. Knock. Knock. Whos there? Not Sarah.

Why do chickens have feathers? Because chickens are birds and birds have feathers.

What do you call a chicken who eats chicken. Cannibal

why was the man so good at holding stuff? he was born with 4 arms!

What was Hitlers first toy? An easy back oven.

What's better than winning the Special Olympics? ...Not being retarted.

Why did Sally ask for ketchup? She wanted to use it on her french fries.

Why didn't the Mexican go to college? He was caught smuggling drugs over the border and was shot.

What do you call a man with a seagull on his head? Whatever his name happens to be.

How would a camel lick its own tongue It doesn't It actually gets karate chopped by Bob Sager.

* two sisters are making yo mama jokes* * mom turns around* mom: Hey yo mama so stupid ... sister one: ummmm.... sister two: sure thats not you?

why does david stutter during meetings. because he smiles till his cheeks hurt

Where is aodhan's ma? Jail, she was cought with a bag full of the white powder.

What did the Atlantic Ocean say to the Pacific Ocean? Sploosh

Why was King Triton mad at Ariel? Her grades were under the C.

Why did the man have no friends? He stabbed an innocent woman and is now rotting in prison.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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