A dog walks into a bar. It was a bar in Taiwan, so they killed it and ate it.

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Roses are red Violets are blue... Violets are not blue they are actually purple

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How do you stuff a giraffe into a refrigerator? You can't, giraffes are too big.

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what do u call a lesbian with long hair? a long haired lesbian.

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How many Jews can you fit in a Volkswagon? 2 in the front seat, 3 in the back.... and that's it because the holocaust never happened.

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knock knock! whos there? me! me who? thats right! whats right? meehoo! thats what i want to know! whats what you want to know? me who? yes, exactly! exactly what? yes, i have an exactlywatt on a chain! exactly what on a chain? yes! yes what? no, exactlywatt! thats what i want to know! i told you--exactlywatt! exactly what? yes! yes what? yes, its with me! whats with you? exactlywatt--thats whats with me! me who? yes! Go away! knock knock.....

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What do you call an asian woman with one leg? By her name.

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There is a high speed pursuit when suddenly the suspect's car skids out of control and crashes into a field. Two cows witness the commotion, when one turns round to the other and says "Moo"

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2 muffins were in the oven when one turned to the other and said. "Damn it's hot in here" The second muffin looked at him with a shocked expression and exclaims "She's burning the potatoes!"

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Q. How many alzhimers patients dose it take to screw in a light bulb? A. To get to the other side

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Why did the pirate get kicked out of the pirate movie? He killed 7 people while looking for treasure under the seats.

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What do you call a lot of goose in one place? geese

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Why don't they have any badminton courts in the jungle? There just isn't the demand.

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Why is my penis so small? No, seriously, can anyone tell me?

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Whats red and yellow? A chicken in the blender.

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what is almost like Jesus? Jesus

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Jane was playing in the back of the bus with an eyeball...up and down,up and down.An old woman asks her : Jane,what are you doing?She responds : I`m trying to see who`s the driver

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You know what assuming leads to... .....Assumptions.

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Three men are sitting in a tub. One of them says "Toss me the soap." The second one says "Toss me the shampoo." The third one says "Toss me the toaster."

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Rosees are red Violets are blue I have schizophrenia and I do too

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What do you do when your baby won't stop crying. Slit its throat

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Two polar bears are sitting in a bathtub. One polar says to the other, "Pass the soap please." And the other polar bear says, "No soap, radio!"

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Man: You know what sucks? Other man: What? Man: Diarrhea... Know what's worse? Other man: No, what? Man: The smell.

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When Life Gives You Melons... You're Probably Dyslexic.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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