If you are riding uphill in a canoe and the wheels fall off, how many pancakes does it take to fit in the dog house? None. Ice cream has no bones.

Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: Not Suzy!!

Why did the man give money to the Jew? Why would a man give money to a Jew?

What do you call a fly without wings? A walk

What is similar about a white person and a white fence? Mexicans jump them.

MILLERS FUNNY LIKE A JEW

Why did the blond woman sell her water skis? She was in a horrible accident and will never walk again.

I thought about taking a nice warm shower, but then I realized that the power was out and it would probably be a cold shower.

Why did it rain happiness? The people who wrote the jokes above and below this one exploded.

What did the asian boy's parents say when he came home with a report full of b-pluses? "You did well, but try harder next time."

Two friends sit down at a table for lunch. One, in a very frustrated mood, says to the other, "You know what I don't get?" His friend immediately responds: "Sex."

What do they call Chinese food in China? Food

Roses are red, Grass is greener, When I think about you, I play with my weiner

What is worse that a bee sting? 2 bee stings what is worse that 2 bee sting? Kony what is wose than Kony? 3 bee stings what is worse than 3 bee sting? being allergic to bee stings

How many babies can fit in a dumpster? Let's not find out...

hi im bob i ate a Pickle sucked a boob and died of a haert atak

Did you hear about the Dislexic Devil worshipers? They sold their soul to Santa.

Why didn't Sammy Robertson make the world series catch to win the series in 1977? Because Sam, like many many discouraged teens in America, didn't follow his life long dream and later became a janitor at his hometown middle-school.

I was in the 74th hunger games I hid in the cornucopia until almost everyone was dead. Then I saw Katniss and Peeta so while they were distracted with night lock I pulled a rubber chicken out of my ass and beat the shit out of them till they died then I won the 75th hunger game also. They asked me to be there mocking jay but I killed them all and blew the plane up in the Capitol the end. By Adam Chebali

I scream, you scream, we all scream when we're chased by bears.

Knock Knock. Who's there? The police. You're under arrest. The police you're under arrest who? Sir, if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves. We have a warrant for your arrest. Sir if you don't open up the door we're going to have to open it ourselves we have a warrant for your arrest who? Sir we are authorized to use deadly force. If you don't comply we will shoot to kill. Sir we are authorized to use deadly force if you don't comply we will shoot to kill wh-

A: Who keeps knocking on the wall? B: My neighbors have sex a lot. A: We should knock back.

Robert Mugabe.

A bear walks into a bar. Everyone evacuates as animal control safely asses the situation.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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