What did the boy with no mom get for Christmas? He was beaten by his drunken and abusive father.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind, parapalegic kid get for Christmas? Some home health supplies. He really needed them, too.

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What's the difference between a baby and a trampoline? I take off my shoes when I jump on a trampoline

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Why can't Ray Charles see? Because he's dead.

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What's big, old, and brown? A tree.

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Why did the black man across the road? just kidding he didnt make it across the road i hit him with my car

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Roses are red violets are blue I have a gassing chamber and you are a jew

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Joker: You wanna know how I got these scars Me: The Bat... Joker: The Batman!

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Why didn't the boy get a bike for christmas? He broke the bath tub.

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Q. Why did Justin Beiber fall off the ladder? A. He was trying to reach puberty

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Where's my tractor?

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Why did the boy fall off his bike? Because he got hit by a fridge. Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she got hit by a fridge. Why couldn't the cat drink its milk? Because it had no face.

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What's the difference between apples and oranges? You can't wash a window with a spade.

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Why did the man go to Jupiter? Because he was on a mission for N.A.S.A.

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What do you call a lubia chin jew slave? Kia

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How many electricians does it take to fix a light bulb? One

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whats chinese noodles

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Why did the baby stop crying? I hit him with a brick.

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Ubisoft presents a game by ubisoft

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One day, a mother was talking with her three daughters. "Mommy," the first one asked, "Why did you name me Daisy?" "Because when we took you home, a daisy petal fell on your head." "Mommy," the second one said, "Why did you name me Rose?" "Because when we took you home, a rose petal fell on your head." "MMMMBBBWWAAAAAAAAAGGGGGHHHHH!" the third daughter cried. She was born with severe cognitive damage and is incapable of coherent speech.

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A man walks into a bar with a giant banana as a head and the bartender asks why he has a giant banana as a head and the man says get me a drink and i will explain, the bartender got the man a drink and he started to explain why, so i found this real nice golden lamp and i rubbed it next thing you know this genie pops out and he said i get three wishes the first one he wishes for unlimited wealth with a snap of the genies fingers the wish came true next he wished to be the most handsome man ever with a spin and a snap the wish came true but this is where it went wrong, I said to the genie and i cant believe he got me with this one (because genies always put a twist on things) i said: i wish for my head to be a banana

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Why did the chicken cross the road? The bold and unpredictable female bird escaped under the horror of the fearful fence of which enclosed the innocent chickens. As she wandered towards the nearby city of magic and dreams she approached by a large, empty road. A mysterious, shining object in the distant caught her eye. As she slowly to a shivering step towards the intereging sparkle, she was ran over by a car. EPIC FAIL LOL!!!!

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Doctor Doctor i have a shoe in my braces. I bet it smells haha.

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Why did the blind man fail his math test? Because he had been raped and murdered. Going blind is a side effect of death.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops