How many blondes does it take to change a diaper? About a thousand

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Why did the racist guy die? Because the black guy stabbed him with a fork.

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How do you make Lady Gaga cry? Make hurtful and upsetting remarks about her person.

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Why can't Stuart post a joke? Because he is using a giant iphone

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i hate when mothers said " clean your room" me " why " mom " because we have guest coming " me " oh i am sorry i didn't know we are all gathering in my f**king room

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Tommy was excited to get a tattoo of a falafel on his wiener. He got skin cancer.

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Roses are red Violets are blue. most poems rhyme but this one doesn't!

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eh

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What did the cow say when he saw his family get murdered? Moo.

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Why do so many people like writting really bad anti jokes? Said Santa Claus

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MILLERS FUNNY LIKE A JEW

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mary poppins' handbag is full of dick

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Why did two rhinos engage in vigorous sex? They were horny.

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They didn't stop pulling my hair i didn't stop pulling the trigger

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Q. How does Michael Jackson pick his nose? A. From a catalogue.

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I don't always drink beer, but when I do, I have a pint or two.

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What's black and hanging from the tree in my backyard? My black, tree-hugging friend.

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Why did the man die when he saw the light? It was a strobe light and he died from an epileptic seizure

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what dyu call a jew on the moon? a problem. what dyu call ten jews on the moon? a bigger problem. what dyu call all the jews on the moon? problem solved.

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An old white lady falls on the ground in the middle of the night. Just then, two positively huge black men in hoodies walk up to her and she is frightened. But as it turned out, they just wanted to help her get on her feet, and called a taxi for her. When she had no money, they gladly paid her fare. This is because they're good people and not muggers

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Knock knock. This is a no soliciting residence, and I do not open my door for strangers.

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A blind man walks into a bar. The next day he goes out and buys a new seeing eye dog.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Getting raped by a giant scorpian. Whats worse than getting raped by a giant scorpian? Getting tortured to death. Whats worse than being tortured to death? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, and getting tortured to death. Whats worse than that? Getting raped by a giant scorpian, getting tortured to death, and finding a worm in your apple.

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Why did everyone want to hang out with the mushroom? They didn't. In fact the mushroom's social anxiety had developed to the stage that he had frequent contemplations of self-harm and is in serious need of extensive therapy.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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