I took a shower yesterday. You have no idea how hard it was sneaking that thing out of Home Depot.

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Rubies are red Some diamonds are blue I have candy so get in my car

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Romeo and Juliet both die at the end of the book. HAHAHAAHAHAHAHAHAHAAHHAAHA i just screwed you guys over.

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hi

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What do you call a man with no arms and no legs? That depends on what his name is.

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What is big, grey, has 8 wheels, can fly, swim and walk. I dunno. Thats why I'm asking

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what did the blue paint say to the red paint? i am blue

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What's the difference between a blonde and a brunette? The pigmentation of their hair follicles.

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NO ONE LIKES YOU!!!!

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When is a bus not a bus? When it turns into a street

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how do you call someone? use a phone

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What do skeet disks and Jewish babies have in common? Hitler used to shoot them out of the sky.

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Your mama's so fat, that she died of diabetes

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Who has two thumbs and lost them? Me but I can't really point at myself due to the lack of thumbs.

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what did the boy say to the over weight girl your fat

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Did you know that many scientists will find out what happens after death within your lifetime? But not their lifetime...

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Hickory Dickory Dock, your mother is a whore

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Knock knock.

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I once met a giraffe, It needed a bath, When I turned on the water, It started to swim, Because it was actually a fish.

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An Englishman, a Scotsman and an Irishman walk into a bar. They have some pints then leave to do their respective tasks for the day.

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How do you find dennis ferguson? Look at danyons bckground

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A guy walks up to a girl and says: " hey can I have your number so can I have your text you later?" she says " no" he says " why ?" she says" guess" He says " look if you don't like me thats okay, " he gets up and walks away, turns out she doesn't have a cell phone, she was gonna give him her house number to call.

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Which is worse, 9/11 or the holocaust? Biting into an apple and finding a worm.

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What do you call a kid with no friends? ....a Sandy Hook survivor

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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