Why did Suzie fall of the swing? Because Suzie was a cucumber.

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Q: How do you make a black man think you're racist? A: Racism

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I'm currently on a seafood diet That is, I only eat seafood.

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A Muslim, a Jew and a Christian are on an airplane talking about religion. The Jew tells the Christian he believes in a single holy entity. The Christian says he believe Christ is the Son of that very same entity. The Muslim says "When can I get out of this room?" because he's been detained at the airport due to religious profiling.

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I got 99 problems and they're all related to long history of drug abuse

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yo mamma is so fat when people look at her they say "you're fat"

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Why did the man cross the road? Because he was applying for a job that's building was located on the other side of the street.

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what happened to the fish that got washed ashore? it died due to lack of water-borne air particles.

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what did the chicken say to the other chicken? nothing, they dont talk.

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Two guys walk into a bar. Whoops did I say bar? I meant Hiroshima 1945. They got radiation poisoning and died slow painful deaths.

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You know it's sunny outside when you go outside and its sunny

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Why are rich guys gay? Because they can afford to be

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What did the Mexican man say to the black man? Hello, how are you today?

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What do you call someone who's father is black (born in Kenya), mother is white (born in Canada), and was himself born in Australia? Someone with tri-citizenship

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How do you stop the mailman from performing his daily routes? You fill his house with blood thirsty bobcats

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Ants are the Velociraptors of the insect world.

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What's red and has two legs? Half a cat!

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Q: What do you get when you cross a cactus and a platypus? A: I was wondering the same thing.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Who. Who, Who? Shut up you damn owl, I'm trying to deliver a pizza.

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Why didnt the car turn on? Cause the keys werent in the ignition

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What's the difference between a trampoline and a pile of dead babies? I have to take off my boots to jump on the trampoline.

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How do you choke a lawyer? You squeeze his neck until he stops breathing.

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What has many legs, but can't walk? A dead spider.

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Potassium? K.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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