A doctor walks out of the delivery room and relieves A nervour father, telling him that his new baby girl has just been born with great health. The father sighs in relief as happyness overwhelms him. With such great news, the doctor chuckles and continues on with the rest of what he had to relay to the father. Your wife died during the delivery.

What's the difference between Izzy and a hobo? Nothing...they both have no job and no friends

why shouldn't you hit a black guy on a bike? Cause violence is against the law

How did the hairless cat brush its hair? It could not, it was hairless. Also, cats do not have opposable thumbs, making it near impossible to do such a thing.

why didn't sue come to her son's baseball game? because he doesn't play baseball, he lost his arms in a horrible plane crash. besides, sue died in that accident anyway.

Why didn't the skeleton go to the dance ? "because he had nobody to go with" No because it was dead.

knock knock Who's there? The Police! Your under arrest.

Why did the monkey fall out of the tree? Because he was dead

Q: What did Batman say to Robin before he got in the car? A: "Get in the car."

Why did a black man toss a bowl into the air? Because he just got it from the microwave and it was extremely hot.

Why can't Michael Jackson play chess? He's dead.

What's the difference between an orange? Two typewriters, because vests don't have sleeves.

What did the farmer say to the chicken? Nothing, the farmer was arrested for having sex with a chicken.

How do you identify a Chinese tank? They smash their own people.

What's worse than ants in your pants? Uncles.

Why does the pope doesn't use this finger? (raise a finger) That's mine!

What did the black guy do with his gun? Shoot a deer

A man walks into a bar. He enjoys a few quiet drinks with friends before returning home to his loving family.

my rhyme is sicker than the holocaust

Why did the girl fall off the swing? Because she had no arms.

Yo momma so ugly she looks out the window and got arrested for mooning.

What do you call a kid with no arms and no legs? Names.

Two muffins are sitting in an oven. The first one turns to the second, and says nothing, because muffins can't talk. They then both die because the temperature in the oven was 370 degrees.

Q. What do you get when you cross a man, a bear and a pig? A. ManBearPig

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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