A morbidly overweight baby eats horse poop and dies a slow horrible death

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Today I'll wear a hat on my head Instead of a shoe.

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Two muffins are in an oven, one muffin looks at the other and says: "Man it's hot in here!" The other muffin looks over and says "Holy cow a talking muffin!"

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Whats funnier than a dead baby? a dead baby in a clown costume!!!

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Q: If 0+0=2 and four shampoo bottles is equal to two toaster strudels, how many pizza slices can Samuel eat? A: Winter because grass=6

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q.how do u kill a jew? a.you glue a penny to the bottom of a pool

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Why was 6 afraid of 7? Because 7 was a clown, and clowns are scary.

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Youu might be a Jew if you........take part in a weekly service at your local synagogue.

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Women's Rights.

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A guy named John wanted to finish his life. Now he is dead

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how do you know if a fish is gay? you ask it

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What do you do when life gives you lemons? Kindly reject the offer and give it back to life.

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What do you tell your chicken when it is it's birthday. Nothing, because he wouldn't understand you.

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Why did Billy fall off the slide? Someone threw a refridgerator at his face.

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What do you get when you mix 5 bottles of beer, a bottle of vodka, 3 glasses of red wine, and 15 jello shots? Alcohol poisoning.

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what's worse than being hiv+? having full blown aids.

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what do you tell a black man getting hit by a police baton? that is racial inequality, and you no longer have to take that due to Abraham Lincoln's Gettysburg Address.

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Knock knock. Who's there? John. Oh, OK I'll be there in a sec. *opens door* Did you bring the blender and the baking tray? Oh no I forgot I'll run back and get them.

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A dinosaur is walking down the street. He is soon confronted by a human. The human says to the dinosaur, "Hey, your a dinosaur." Which the dinosaur replies with, "Yes, yes i am." The dinosaur then stands there for a few seconds wondering why he is in the same time period as the human. And as to why a dinosaur would talk.

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What did the tiger say to the monkey? Nothing really, just a lot of growls and other sounds as he consumed it.

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What's green and eats rocks? A green rock eater What's purple and eats rocks? It hasn't been discovered by science yet...

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, there is no reason for a chicken to need to cross a road.

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Roses are red Violets are blue I have Alzhiemers Wait, who are you

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Why didn't the chicken cross the road? He didn't give in to peer pressure.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops