Why didn't the woman need a watch? Because she had both her hands amputated after battling diabetes.

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How does a Chinese person wear a contact lens? On a 45 degree angle

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What is life? Paul.

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Why didn't Johnny ride his bike to school? Both of his legs were amputated. He can't ride a bike ever again.

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why wasnt nathan invited the party? nathan's been dead for 5 years

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Why couldn't Bobby attend his friends wedding? He was struck by lightning. Knock. Knock. Who's there? Not Bobby

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What do you get when you cross bread an eagle, a wolf and shark together? I don't know, but I'm pretty sure it will kill all of us!

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Roses are brown Violets are brown There is crap in my garden

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What's the difference between 31 dead hookers and a Lamborghini? One is a traumatizing tragedy that left at least 31 poor families mourning for their loved ones, whom were only trying to make a living in what is a terrible economy and were unable find a better job, and the other is an overpriced sports car.

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Knock knock. Who's there? No one, because your house burned down.

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The once was a little girl named Suzy who liked swings; the only trouble was that she had no arms. In order to avoid having any jokes written (and recycled thousands of times) about this fact, she decided to run a sponsored marathon in order to pay for prosthetic arms. Suzy swung happily for the rest of her days. [L]

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Why did the christian go into the church? To pray.

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what is awesome but stupid at the same time? school i lied about the awesome part :p

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WHATS A GREAT RAVE TUNE KANE !!!!! TUCKER !!!!!!!! DUH DUH DUH DUH DUH !!!!!!!!!!!!!!

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what do you call a shitty anti-joke? A shitty anti-joke.

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What was wrong with the tomato? Nothing.

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What is 33 + 1? Penis

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Why did the boy only have one arm? tigers make terrible pets

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Why couldn't the blind man see his friend? He was behind him.

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What did the Mexican say to the Pirate? Can I have a pound for my bus, pal?

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I went out for a nice evening with my wife last week, and we kept getting dirty looks because I'm 42 and she's 19. I get that people are a little weird about that for whatever stupid reason, but it totally ruined our tenth anniversary.

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What do you call a lump on your penis? STD

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hello what is this crazy nonsense site sl

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This is a stupid joke. Get it to the top of the list and Kobe Bryant will pass to you.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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