How many dead babies can you fit in a trunk? 37.

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Stop me if you heard this one before.

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I have a great knock knock joke. You start. Go.

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A captain crashes his boat into a rock. He has the option to save to save his wife or his best friend. He saves neither and drowns.

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What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

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your momma is so fat that when she steps on the scale it shows that she is overwhieght

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why did the zack fall off his bike because his mum thew a frege at him

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cancer isn't that good for you. so try not to get it

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In Soviet Russia, Joseph Stalin killed a lot of people and there was nothing funny about it.

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Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

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Why are anti jokes so repetitive? Because you're reading too many, get off your computer.

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What's hotter than a woman who is face down and ass up? A woman who isn't tying her shoes.

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A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" the bartender asks. The horse kills everyone in the bar and stampedes the other horses into town.

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Q. What happened to the man that kept an open hand? A. He is in jail because he beat his family

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Why did Bob get off the swing? Because he was done.

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How does a t-rex eat spaghetti? He didn't he ate a velocaraptor instead.

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What did the teacher do? He taught.

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mitchell palmer sucks

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What is Hellen Keller's favorite movie? Around the block in 80 days.

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If anyone has a KIK, put it in the comments.

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There was 3 Men. Who had crashed their car on there way back from the Bar, All 3 of them died. Once they got to heaven, Jesus told him " The better in life you were with relationships,and staying true with one love- The better Transportation you get." Guy one got a Scooter. Guy two got a bike. And Guy 3 got a Mustang. One day, Guy 1 and 2 were on their bike and scooter. And they see Guy 3 upset. "Whats wrong? You got the best transporation in heaven!!" Guy 3 looks up at guy 1 and 2, Then says " I know I do..... But, I just seen my wife on a Skateboard."

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A dead guy walks into a grave.

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Ludwig van Beethoven, John Coltrane, John Lennon, and Justin Bieber are out for lunch at a taco stand. The owner calls the police, and Justin Bieber is arrested for digging up corpses.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because its instincts were telling it that the higher amount of grass on the other side of the road would lead to an increase in the odds of survival due to a more adequate source of food and nourishment.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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