WOKE UP THIS MORNING AND SAW PROSTITUTE OUT THE WINDOW AND SAID GRANDMA GRANDMA CAN I GO PLAY WITH THAT PROSTITUTE SHE SAID NO YOU CAN PLAY WITH ME BECAUSE I'M A PROSTITUTE TOO

Why did the baby crawl onto the road? because a sick bastard put a bottle of milk there knowing that a bus would be going through that route soon.

Yo mama's so poor, she doesn't have a lot of money.

I have a great knock knock joke. You start. Go.

What do you do to a brain dead man to get his money? Pull the plug.

A captain crashes his boat into a rock. He has the option to save to save his wife or his best friend. He saves neither and drowns.

What does a lonely man do on opposite day? I don't know. Why should we know what he does, that is both weird and illegal. Stalking is a serious crime and should not be used. We do not know what he does on normal days, thus we cannot come to a conclusion to this question. However, I do hypothesize that he must be social on this day because this is the opposite of lonely.

Why did the woman leave the kitchen? She didn't, she's a woman.

You might be a redneck if someone slaps you on the back of the neck.

Q:What happens when a bug walks into a bar A:It gets stepped on

your momma is so fat that when she steps on the scale it shows that she is overwhieght

Why cant i stand up? Cause i shat my pants

In Soviet Russia, Joseph Stalin killed a lot of people and there was nothing funny about it.

why did the zack fall off his bike because his mum thew a frege at him

Q. What happened to the man that kept an open hand? A. He is in jail because he beat his family

What did the teacher do? He taught.

What's hotter than a woman who is face down and ass up? A woman who isn't tying her shoes.

Why are anti jokes so repetitive? Because you're reading too many, get off your computer.

What is Hellen Keller's favorite movie? Around the block in 80 days.

How does a t-rex eat spaghetti? He didn't he ate a velocaraptor instead.

mitchell palmer sucks

If anyone has a KIK, put it in the comments.

cancer isn't that good for you. so try not to get it

A horse walks into a bar. "Why the long face?" the bartender asks. The horse kills everyone in the bar and stampedes the other horses into town.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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