sometimes when im bored i dress in white pour water on the ground and roll around in it and pretend im a papertowel

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what did the boy get after his first communion? unwanted intercourse with his priest that resulted in scaring him for life, until the day he killed himself because he could never get over it.

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Two peanuts were walking down the street. Well actually, they just rolled a bit and then stopped. Peanuts don't have legs.

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I took a vampire out for dinner last night. I expected her to cringe when I ordered a rare steak, but we decided not to let my tastes impact on the evening, sharing wine and many stories before heading back to my apartment.

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- Hi, my name is Sarah Lennon. - Wow! Are you related to Sarah Palin?!

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what has genitial warts? me

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What do you call a women with 2 black eyes? Hopefully nothing because abuse is something that shouldn't be messed with and it is wrong.

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so there is a 13 year old boy who got left home while the rest of his family was driving to colorado, so the police comes to his door, and says son your whole family has just died in a plane accident. And the boy says, but my family was driving. . . the policeman then says, i'm aware, the plane actually hit their car and only killed your family.

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What did the boy find I'n his water? Ice

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Roses are red, Violets are red, Trees are red, Bushes are red, Oh shit, my garden is on fire

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Hey you know what? What? Never mind.

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What do you call a dinosaur that wears a cowboy hat and boots? It depends on what his name is.

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Want to hear a clean joke? Soap.

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- Women have rights, aren't they? - Yes, they have.

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Words with two W's or N's in them are awkward and unnecessary.

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what is behind your butt? DEEZ NUTS

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Hi, how are you doing? Good, yourself? Fine, thanks. Have a nice day. You too, bye.

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Knock Knock. Who's there? Who. Who, Who? Shut up you damn owl, I'm trying to deliver a pizza.

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Why did john have to have back surgery He needed his back "screwed" up

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Hey I'm a poet and I didn't even realize that I was a poet

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Knock, Knock! Who`s there? Your mama`s stupid! Your mama`s stupid who? Your mama`s stupid as a rock! I` m going to cut your eyes out and use them as baseballs!

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Why didnt the car turn on? Cause the keys werent in the ignition

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A jumpercable walks in the bar the bartender says ill get you something but dont start anything.

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Justin's life

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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