Q: Why did the chicken cross the road? A: She was going to speek at a PETA meeting about the cruel conditions of chicken farms. I hit her with my car

The other day a man came to my door. After I opened it, he told me, "I'm sorry, your mother is dead." He paused, then said, "Just kidding." "Actually," I told him, "my mom died two years ago of natural causes." He turned around and left, and I closed the door. All in all, it was a very confusing situation, and I'm not sure how I feel about it.

Magic! Well not really, you see, people that are stressed have the tendency to remain far longer into the state of hypnosis because their body conciously and subconciously (I am typoing it, but I cant bother to type it correctly fuck it) seek out the state of peace that hypnosis gives more often. Anyway, I know another thing that helps relieve stress, cough... Now, did you know that if you push your nose upwards slightly, you will feel a finger between your legs? its because nerve endings are connected that way, give it a go.

What is the black kid down the street getting for his birthday? Well first of all, his name is Pat. And he asked his parents for an Xbox that he will likely receive, and I assume a variety of other gifts from friends and family.

why did the boy die he had a raging case of cardiovascular disease

Sweet! I've just received my free minecraft giftcode! >> Minecraftcodes.info <

boys

A bear eats some honey. I'm not really sure why and I've never seen a bear eat honey in real life so I don't really know if the bear actually ate any.

Roses are grey Violets are grey I'm a dog

Roses are red Violets are... The poem was never finished due to the fact that the reader had narcolepsy and promptly fell asleep.

Ask me what my favorite color is. What's you favorite color? Blue.

whats funnier than 24? your grammar, its more funny thank you.

What would a man say if you urinated all over his legs? WHAT THE DEUCE?

What did the black guy say to you when you took his fried chicken Give me back my chicken

Write your own pointless joke on http://pointless-jokes.tk

What is worse than finding a worm in your apple? The Holocaust.

a blond girl walks into a bar

What's worse than finding a worm in your apple? Being raped by a Triceratops.

Why is Short Circuit the best movie ever made? Because it tastes like lemons

roses are blue violets are red and just like you they're messed up in the head

Like to tell patrick porcupine to stop gaming

Why isn't Hellen Keller a good driver? She's dead.

What's faker than Nicki Minaj's tits? Women rights.

Why did the little girl fall of the swingset. She got kidnapt and raped by a giant scorpion.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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