Roses are red, My name is Dan, I have a gun, get in the van

thumb_up thumb_down -32

what do you call cheese thats not yours? stolen, your under arrest

thumb_up thumb_down -32

knock, knock who's their? police get down on the ground!

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What happened when a star exploded? It killed billions of other sentient beings.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

When life gives you lemons.... Don't eat them, because you're probable hallucinating, and you don't know where they came from.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

wake n shake = wake up and masterbate to a picture of drew e mom o.O

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Q /why do people eat dinner? A/ because their hungry

thumb_up thumb_down -32

You know Hellen Kellers retarded? No shes blind and deaf. Ehhh same thing.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

whats worse then being a jew now? being a jew in 1942

thumb_up thumb_down -32

If omar has 7 apples and his bus is 7 minutes early, what is the mass of the sun? Pi. Partially because the piece of paper couldnt dance with your mother.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Q: What happened when Cupid shot his arrow into the guys heart? A: He died

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why was the black guy homeless? because he has been affected severely by the credit crunch, been made redundant and had his home repossessed

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Beethoven! It is true? Did you really lose your hearing? Yes.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

a man walks into a bar, when he leaves he thinks he can hold his liquor and kills a mother and two children attempting to drive home.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Why was the boy crying? His mother has terminal cancer, and his father does not have the financial stability to cover the cost of the surgery and keep up on house payments and buying clothes and food for the children. He will be living in a foster home in a matter of a week.

thumb_up thumb_down -32

so how about that irline food

thumb_up thumb_down -32

What's the difference between a chicken and a bartender? A chicken is a domesticated fowl, a subspecies of the red junglefowl. As one of the most common and widespread domestic animals, with a population of more than 24 billion in 2003, there are more chickens in the world than any other species of bird. Humans keep chickens primarily as a source of food, consuming both their meat and their eggs. A bartender is a person who mixes and serves alcoholic drinks at a bar. also bar-tender ; 1836, American English,

thumb_up thumb_down -32

Two Pigs are in a bath. One pig says to the other "pass me the soap", to which the other pig replies "Do I look like a typewriter?"

thumb_up thumb_down -34

They see me trollin' They hatin'...

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Why did the white bartender kick out a black man and his Mexican friend out of the bar? It was closing time

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Knock, knock who's there? Steve Evans. Steve Evans who? You've already forgotten me? We just met on Eharmony yesterday.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

A black man, a jew, a hispanic, and an asian are the only survivors of a plane crash, and end up on a deserted island, what do they do? Die.

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Bee1:Boo Bee2:Boo Look i found 2 boobies:)

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Knock knock Who's there? Benjamin Benjamin who? Benjamin Dover Ben! I'm so glad you're home the kids have missed you so much!

thumb_up thumb_down -34

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops