I walks over to da shop de oother day and there was this guy and he was like... I bought some petrol. LOoooooooooL

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COME HERE, POTTER!!!! NOW!!! Instead of agreeing to approach the source of the rather hostile summoning, Potter decided to sit down and eat a healthy vegetarian lunch of sausages and chips.

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How are friends and bananas alike? If you peel their skin and eat them they die.

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The Juice where prosecuted by many time.

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what do you call people who keep reffering to the holocost , and cancer sufferers on this site? sad and sick individuals

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Q:How do you kill Chuck Norris ? A:You don't , He kills you first.

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How does Steven Hawkings refresh after a long day of work? F5

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Why did the monkey fall from the tree? It passed away in its sleep.

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What Sound does a baby make in a blender? I don't know I'm to busy masturbating to it

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A terminte walks into a pub and ask is the bar tender here?

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How can a hobo become rich? It can't. It died from food poisoning from eating food out of the trash.

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What is the easiest method of making multiple women fall head over heels? Have a wingman help you raise a rope at the start of a women's running race.

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How many Jews can you fit in to a car? Well depending on the car 2-8

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A legless and armless woman is laying on the beach. A man walks by and hears her crying. "What's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been kissed before" says the woman. So the man leans down and kisses her. The next day the man sees the woman crying at the beach again. "What's wrong this time?" asks the man. "I've never been hugged before" So the man picks up the legless and armless woman and gives her a big hug. The next day the man sees the woman still on the beach crying. "Okay now what's wrong?" asks the man. "I've never been f---ked before" says the woman. So the man picks up the woman, and has sex with her. They end up going on several dates later on and getting married at sunset on the very beach where they met.

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I am in love with pizza. It was a friday night and i was hanging around with my so called friends 'banana-rama' 'pearman' and 'peaches' (keep in mind these are all fruit). I ordered a pizza from Poker Pizza and it came an hour later i brung it to my kitchen and i opened the box. It was lovely. I eat it, i soon realized that I had eat my one true love and decided to order another pizza.

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Yo mama is so stupid... She didn't graduate high school.

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What smells like diarrhea and looks like poop? A rotten banana.

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Yo momma so old some said act ur age and she dies

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Why did the doctor not make it to his appointment in time? Because he died in 9/11!

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What does a cookie and the twin towers have in common? They both crumble.

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Yo mama is so fat that she has to eat salad instead of sandwiches because she wants to lose weight by going on a no-carb diet.

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Why did David go swimming? Pink sock.

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I played the spoon game. In a white neighborhood.

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why were the girls confused? they were in a logic class and couldn't seem to find the irrationality chapter in the book

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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