Why was the boy sad? Because he had a frog stapled to his face.

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What did the fish say when he ran into a wall? Fish don't run.

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knock knock who's there? the police, we have a warrant for your arrest.

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What's a boomerang that doesn't come back? A stick

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A friend of mine said; the only vegetables that makes you cry are oignons. that was before I hit him with a watermelon

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Why did a homeless man eat another man's face off? Because he was hungry.

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10% of car thieves are left-handed. 80% of chimpanzees are left-handed. Therefore, if your car is stolen, there's an 8% chance a chimpanzee is responsible.

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A bear walks into a bar, and says "I'd like a gin... and tonic." The bartender says "AAAAHHH! A BEAR!!!" and calls animal control. Later after the beast has been tranquilized and carted away, he rationalizes having heard the bear speak as trauma-induced hallucination.

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whats the best part about ebola? nothing ebola is a dangerous virus

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Roses are red So are you Cause you killed my dreams So I killed you

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if you are reading this your wasting your time

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Why did the black man sleep all day? He suffered from narcolepsy.

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A guy walked into a bar, ouch.

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A manly man drives up in a yellow bug, What do the girls think? They think its very manly! (;

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family

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What did the farmer say when he lost his tractor? Nothing, he found his tractor and went back to work.

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A 21 year old man walks into a bar. After looking at the menu for a minute he orders the cocktail of the day. The bartender looks at the man in disbelief because he has such a baby face and looks like a teenage kid. The bartender politely asks to see his ID. The man pulls out his wallet and shows him his drivers license. Sure enough he was the legal age of drinking. The bartender says "Thank you" and gives him his beverage.

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It had cancer.

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Your momma's so fat she ate oranges and coffe

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Tom: Knock knock! Guy: Who's there? Tom: Carrot. Guy: Impossible.

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What should you give your Italian plumber for a refreshment? Water, because he's probably working so hard that he's thirsty.

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If a tree falls in the woods does it make a sound? It depends on how sound is defined

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what did the kid with no head get for his birthday? A coffin.

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I was hungrey then i saw a man puke. Im still very hungrey. Then i threw up. Im not so hungrey

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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