Why did the boy have a rash? He didn't, it was a birthmark.

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Why can't Helen Keller drive Umm, She's dead

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What happend when they were 3 guys in the air? They were skydiving

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Yo momma's so ugly that she could not find another partner after the tragic death of your father

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Want to hear a clean joke? Soap.

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender asks "Why the long face?" The horse does not respond because it is a horse. It can neither speak nor understand English.It is confused by it's surroundings and gallops out of the bar, knocking over a few tables.

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roses are red yoda is green my lightsaber needs 2 hands if you know what i mean

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emma brown i did tap that shit -jackson edwards

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There was a boy named Steven, a son of a rich business man. Steven was an interesting child though, as he always kept care to one of his possessions. That possession being a plain, old, brown box. On Steven's fourth birthday his father said he could have anything in the world he wanted, just name it. Steven said he wanted two quarters to put in his box. The father agreed and gave his son two quarters to put in his box. Every year the father would say he could have anything he wished for, and Steven just asked for two quarters. Nothing more. On Steven's 18th birthday he got into a severe car crash. The father stood over the hospital bed where Steven lay. "I can get you the best doctors in the world. They can save you, please let me get you this for your birthday!" The boy shook his head. "All I want is two quarters" Steven replied. The father was distraught. "Son, tell me why you've wanted these two quarters every year you have been alive instead of anything else in the world". The boy complied. "Fine I'll tell you." Then Steven died before he could tell the father. The End.

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After pursuing a speeding vehicle for 10km at speeds ranging from 120 - 160km/h, the police officer managed to stop the driver. The driver of the vehicle rolled down the window and asked, "What seems to be the problem officer?" to which the police officer replied, "It sounds like one of your cylinders is firing incorrectly, you have a fairly large amount of carbon build-up on and around your exhaust pipe."

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What did the dog say to the Jewish Rabbi? Bark

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Q: What's worse than getting a divorce? A: I don't know, i'm still married.

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Your mother is so fat that when she looks in the mirror she is deeply upset by her appearance.

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Why was the guy with six fingers called John? His name was John.

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Roses are red Violents are blue Oranges

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Why did the cookie go to the hospital? It had cancer.

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What do you call a man with no arms? Richard, as that is his name.

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Why did Suzie fall off the swing? She has no arms.

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make me a sandwich! what kind?

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What is red and bad for your teeth? A brick.

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What did the lady say to the boy who's parents just died? Haha, your parents just died.

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Roses are Red Violets are Red My Garden is on Fire.

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the lemon was sweet.

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i put a oie in the oven, it baked

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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