A man walked into the woods... Sorry, I forgot the rest of the joke...

What's big, an instrument, has black and white keys, and is located in the bathroom? I don't know. A piano. But why in the bathroom? Don't tell me how to furnish my house.

What did the farmer say when the potatoes were ready for harvest? The potatoes are ready for harvest.

why did the kid fall down the stairs? he had polio

emma brown i did tap that shit -jackson edwards

What did the president say after his wife and kids left Him? Im Obama self now

What's funnier than a dead baby? Almost everything. Infant mortality rates are incrediby high in many third world countries, and it is certainly no laughing matter.

What's red and bad for your teeth? A Brick

Why is cancer a big thing? -It has grown after the diagnoses

Why was six afraid of seven? Because seven's bigger.

whats the best part about ebola? nothing ebola is a dangerous virus

What's black white and red all over A Nun after being pushed down the stairs

why was the little boy sad he found out he had breast cancer

What do you call a fish without an eye? Impaired of vision.

Whats the difference between a Bicycle and a duck? They Both have handlebars, except for the duck.

A snail walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "hey we don't serve snails here," and flicks him across the street. 3 years later the snails walks back into the bar and said, "why'd ya do that for??"

Why did susie fall off the swing? She didn't have any arms... Why didn't she get up? She didn't have any legs... Why didn't anyone help her? She didn't have any friends. Then she died

How do you make an anti-joke? Like this....

what does the black man say to the white man? nice weather were having huh.

If David has 40 chocolate bars and eats 35 what does David have now? Diabetes, David has diabetes.

How do you wake up Lady Gaga? You shove her off the bed

What did God say when he made the first black person? I have just added a significant element of diversity to the human species. Intolerance between ethnicities will surely prove to be an obstacle in societal progression, creating hardships for many. I know this because I am God.

How do you name a beast who eat rocks and fly. rock-eater flying beast

Why did the giraffe fall over? Because I shot it with a bowling ball cannon,

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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