A woman comes at the doctor.

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What's worse than the holocaust? Finding half a worm in your apple.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Because chickens are stupid. It most likely starved to death when it got stuck in a hole.

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Whats Funnier than a clown? Woman's Basketball.

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How do you kill a blond? Shoot her in the face.

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Question: So, what do you get if you put a live dog, a dead cat, some sugarcubes, and your sisters panties (HORMONES OKAY? EVERYBODY KNOWS HORMONES EQUALS SPICE! Or something anyways...) In a blender until its all red and squishy? The hell I know, but put some Redbull in it, and its fucking delicious!

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I have two coins in my hand that add up to 30 cents, and one of them is not a nickel. I accidentally dropped them.

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A blind man walks into a bar. The bartender looks at the man for a moment, then asks : - Excuse me, sir. Are you blind ? And the blind man says : - Yes.

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What's the difference between a leopard and a jaguar ? The rabbit flies faster, while the pigeon can breathe underwater.

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What is the difference between England and yogurt? One is a Western-European country and the other is a dairy product.

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Whats worse than finding a worm in your apple? Finding an apple in your worm.

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What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh

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whats red and bad for your teeth... A brick.

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Roses are red, Violets are blue, Orchids are white, Sunflowers are yellow

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Your momma's so fat that she contracted type 2 diabetes and died at a young age because obesity is a huge problem in America.

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A fish swims into a bar The town is flooded and thousands are dead

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The word "Walter" is never funny.

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What's good about eating every night? Knowing that an African won't.

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Dad: hi son Kid: (looks sad and looks at the ground) Dad: what's wrong son. Kid:I raped a girl. Dad:Who? Did you rape son! Kid:mom.

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A:Knock Knock B:It's open

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A horse walks into a bar. The bartender says "Why the long face" The horse responds "My daughter has cancer"

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What's worse than getting in a car accident? Being turned into dust and swarmed by bees while on fire

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How do you get birds to land in your back yard? With a gun.

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Why did the blind man walk into a shop He didin't walked into a wall

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...


Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops