- Anti Joke

Why is the alien dead as a door-nail? Because the door-nail was never alive nor could it ever be dead therefore the alien must have never existed just like the life and death of the door-nail.

What do you call Helena… A Shady palm tree

How do you make Samuel L. Jackson cry? Trick question...Samuel L. Jackson don't cry. ever...

What did Sally get for Christmas? Who's Sally?

What is your name, sir? My name is not Sir, my name is Jeff.

why did the midget beat the basketball player in a foot race? the basketball player got bit by a scorpion and died within minutes.

I forgot how the joke starts but the punchline goes something something something your moms a slut.

Why are black people black? Because they're clearly not white.

What color do you wear if you're in the NAVY? Beige, white, sometimes camouflage - really, it depends on your rank and the situation.

Two polar bears, oddly enough, are sitting in a bathtub. One of them asks "Could you pass the soap?" The other obliges and gives him the soap.

What did the bride do on her wedding day? Get married.

Why did the toilet paper roll? Because it isn't rock!

Why did the prince kiss his beloved just before going into battle? Intermission.

What's brown and hides in the closet? The Diarrhea of Anne Frank.

Q. What did the father say to his son? A. Nothing, he just hit him with his belt. His wife tried to intervene, but she too was hit by said belt.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK! Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops

What's worse than missing your flight? Realizing that everyone who got on it died from a bomb

What's blue and fluffy? Blue fluff.

What do you call a Mexican kicking a ball? A soccer player

Why did little Lisa fall off the swings? She had no arms

So a guy with no legs and no arms is on his death bed. He asks to sky dive one time before he dies.

Q: If Alma have 4 corners..? A: Then there must be something wrong with Alma...

Why can't Helen Keller just kidding she's dead