Man 1: Ask me if im a flower Man 2: "are you a flower?" Man 1: if i was a flower do you think i could talk? man 1 was wondering why man 2 was so uneducated

Why did the chicken cross the road? If you don't know the answer by now, there's something wrong with you.

Hey, you why you say poo poo nae nae watch me whip, and do the dougie, and then happy halloween? Potato Salad

Why is Joel even here? Sexperience.

How babies can you fit in a car seat? 1

How do you get a person to jump off a cliff? You push them.

In Soviet Russia, everything you do will have an equal and opposite effect, for the laws of physics still apply in every part of the world. No matter where you are.

What's better than seeing a Detroit Lions game? Not being in Detroit.

Why was the black man driving a plane? because he was a pilot, you racist.

roses are green, violets are yellow, I am a hybridizer.

why did the chicken cross the road cause i fucked your mom

What did the little boy get after falling and hitting his face on the ground? A prolonged nosebleed. And Leukemia.

What do astronauts and Wayne Rooney have in common? I don't know. Ok.

- Wanna see a magic trick? - Sure - Too bad. I don't know any.

What do you get when you put a baby in a blender? A life sentence in prison.

"Tell me a joke" Tom says Your life.

Roses are red, Violets are blue, I am Jack Bauer, Where is the nuke?

A girl asks a guy are you finish. The guy says no I'm British.

Why did Sarah fall of the swing? She had no arms. Knock Knock Who's there? Not Sarah.

what is another way to say tree? A big stick with leaves

Emily Walker.

jibby jobby

What did one lawyer say to the other? Your son's coming to my son's birthday party, right?

How many tortoises does it take to change a light bulb? One. Just don't expect it to be done quick.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

Want more? You might be interested in...