did you know helen keller had a swingset? neither did she

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Why are all the tech support people from India? That's where the majority of call centers are located.

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What happened to the little boy who threw a spitball at the teacher? He was killed the next day when the teacher, who had a history of mental instability and schizophrenia, decided to go on a shooting rampage in class.

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A Stoner sees a bag of chips.

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What do you get when you rape a dead baby filled with jalapeños? A lifetime in prison, and a burning penis.

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How do you pick up girls in Auschwitz? With a dustpan

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Knock Knock Who's There Al Qaeda

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Why do bats fly in circles? They're mentally retarded.

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What do you get for the man that has everything already? Another one.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? Exercise

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There once was an old lady who lived in a shoe. She had so many children, her vagina fell off.

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How many people does it take to screw in a lightbulb? most likely one unless there is physical disability that makes this person incapable of this action

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Why did the blonde woman decide to get plastic surgery? Because she was self-conscious and unhappy with the way she looked.

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why is six afraid of seven? because seven is black

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Knock Knock. READ THE DAMN SIGN IT SAYS NO SOLICITORS!!! ... yeah.

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What's brown and sticky? A stick. What's green and shitty? A bootleg stick.

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WHO THE FUCK IS NERO AND THAT BITCH THAT CLAIMS TO BE NOT NERO BUT NOT NEROMETAL OR WHATEVER? THEY BOTH CLAIM TO BE THE FUCKING MORAL MAN? I STARTED MY RISE TO INFAMY FOR LIKE... Fuck, when I was still studying, it was a fucking social project to prove that others opinions DO NOT MATTER SHIT IN THE END! And now these bastards (some cult faggot and Some "Nerometal" which are probably the same queer) CLAIM TO BE THE MORALMAN? I AM THE MORAL MAN! I AM YOUR FRIENDLY RAPIST/SOCIOPATH! YOU FAKE QUEERMASTERS! I CHALLENGE YOU!

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what did the blond do when her house was on fire? she called the fire department, because that would be the correct thing to do in such a situation.

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Whats 1 foot long and went in and out of my girlfriend? Our new baby

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Who has lots of friends, but smells like urinate feceas? Smelly McD, I lied about the friends.

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an irishman walks past a bar a.w. j.p.

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Roses are blue Violets are red I got this backwards Carpets are nice

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Whats the difference between a baby and a watermelon? One is fun to smash with a hammer. The other is a watermelon.

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Q. Why were the children sad? A. They'd just been abducted by a dodgy old man in a van.

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

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