Q. How many dead babies can you fit into a bathtub? A. That obviously depends on the size of the bathtub and each individual infant.

a kid was running across the street. he just got hit by a truck

Children + my basement + my finger = yes

What did you get for your birthday? I got older

Billy: Hey Timmy, you're so fat your high school picture was an aerial photograph Timmy: Oh yeah? Well you're so fat when you tried to take that photograph the helicopter pilot told you to get out because you're too fat

Why couldn't Helen Keller drive? Because she was deaf, dumb, and blind.

Why did the boy cross the road? He was visiting his dying grandmother at the hospital.

What did Superman say to Batman when they first met? Nothing. They are not real.

Whats 1 foot long and went in and out of my girlfriend? Our new baby

What the librarian say to the man? Hi, can I help you?

what did the fart say to the butt........bye

how do you get a man with a gun out of your house? you don't.

Q. What is a deaf man's favorite song? A. Nothing, because he can not hear.

Whats 2+2=? ?= CHICKEN

why did the chicken cross the road it didn't it got hit y a car

what kind of sex did ethan have? webcam sex

What did the bartender say to the man? can i have a beer if you dont get it the bartender asked the customer for a beer

I was trying to think of a joke to write, but then I became unsatisfied with my creativity and began to spiral into a depressing tangent of thoughts. I just took 37 Ambien, and have approximately ten minutes to live. Instead, I will spend my last moments writing goodbye messages to friends on Facebook and longingly looking at images of the past. Goodbye, world.

so your snowboarding in the dessert and all four of your tires pop. how many pancakes does it take to cover a dog house. the answer is B. 500 squids

An Englishman walks into a bar.

whats black with purple?nothing no animals or humans have anything like that

Wanna know a Chuck Norris fact? He is 72 years old and likely to die soon

What do you call a boomerang that doesn't come back? Misthrown

I own two ferrets. I was merely stating something factual.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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