why was the toddler sad? he was diagnosed with cancer after his dog was put down because it raped and murdered his parents

if chuck norris had 5 dollars and you had 10 dollars you would have 5 dollars more than Chuck Norris

Why can't Hellen Keller drive? Because she's dead.

I have CDO it's like OCD but in the right order

A man goes to a gas station to pump gas in his car. After about 7 minutes, he leaves.

What happened when Mark's hair died? He got depressed that he was growing old and the signs of it were showing.

Why couldnt the old man ski? There was no snow.

Where did Susie go after the explosion? I don't know: she was nowhere near the explosion at the time that it happened. She probably got up to use the bathroom.

What would you call the jetsons if they were black? Niggers

Why did the girl fall off the swing? She had no arms.

What did the leperchaun get at the bake sale? baked goods.

What mouse walks on two legs? Mickey Mouse. What bear walks on two legs? Winnie the Pooh. What duck walks on two legs? All of them, dumbass.

If you give a mouse a cookie... ...youre ruining its natural diet. it might die.

A man came home one day, drunk and feeling horny. He proceeded to the bedroom where he found his wife just getting into bed in a lace bra and sexy underwear. This turned him on even more so he cuddled up to her and whispered seductivly in her ear before kissing her neck. His wife was not in the mood for sex so she shot him

Why did the chicken cross the road? Because it looking for food for it was starving to death.

Yesterday, upon the stair, I met a man who wasn't there. I saw him there again today; I've been sectioned. [L]

Why was the man white? Because he wasn't black. All credit goes to Caravel.

why couldn't the man play frisbee? he was a dog

Whats worse then a worm in your apple This joke

S + B + B = SB fuckin' B

1: Knock Knock? 2: Who's There? *runs*

Why did the little boy cry? He fell down the stairs

What did the thin Italian say to the fat Italian? I don't know, I can't speak Italian.

What do you get if you cross a kangaroo with a sheep? ProtestS from Anti GM activists.

Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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