Q:whats the difference between grass and a car? A:They all have wheels, except the grass

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Knock Knock Who's there? The police. Your husband died.

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What dosent kill you only makes you injured

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A drunk walks out of a bar gets in his car and proceeds to drive home the driver passed out at the wheel swerved in the wrong lane and smashed the car of the Jefferson family a young family of 4, the Jefferson family's car exploded into flames while the drunk sat back laughed and rubbed the wound on his head

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What happened to Timmy went to get ice cream from the ice cream truck? He was raped and never seen again, his family now mourns there loss

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Why so serious ?

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A guy walks into a bar. He loses conciseness because of the force of the metal bar hitting his skull.

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What's worse than a rainy day? Rape.

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What is invisible and smells like rabbits? Bunny farts.

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Why did the black guy have a nice sterio? He has a well paying job and decided to treat himself.

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What do democrats and fire have in common? They both do damage

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roses are blue violets are red heres a gun now your dead

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Roses are red, Violets are purple.

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An atom walks into a bar. Did it grow legs?

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Your mama so fat that when she cut herself gravey came out and we drank it too!

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Stick figure says to the artist "Can't you make it any bigger?" Artist:"No, I ran out of lead?"

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How do you make a plumber cry? Kill his family.

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Why did the chicken cross the road? It didn't, chickens aren't capable of crossing roads without being involved in a car accident.

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What's the sound of one hand clapping? The same as two hands; just not as loud.

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What did the deaf, dumb, blind kid with two stump arms and no legs get for Christmas? Cancer

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Why did the Taxi crash? The cab driver was trying to remove the frog stapled to his face.

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why did Susay fall of the swing? Cause she had no arms

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Why did the man yell at his wall? Because it jumped out and scared him when he walked past

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How many babies does it take to tile a roof? Depends how thinly you slice them

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Anti Joke

What are Antijokes? Anti Jokes (or Anti Humor) is a type of comedy in which the uses is set up to expect a typical joke setup however the joke ends with such anticlimax that it becomes funny in its own right. The lack of punchline is the punchline.

Our Updated iOS App!

We've just released huge update to the iOS app! Now, access all your favorite text and photo sites like Anti-Joke, DIYLOL! A few things didn't make the original cut (like comments) but they'll be back soon. Best of all, the app is now FREE! Get it here.

The Anti Joke Book


NEW ANTI-JOKE BOOK!  Now that we've resolved the printing issues with our publisher, check out the BRAND SPANKING NEW Anti-Joke Book!

MOAR??

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Anti-Joke Chicken

Anti-Joke Triceratops